Greetings, salutations, and warmest regards. Messrs. Fitzhalfyard and d’Almirall, and the Lady Laura Fitzhalfyard most cordially implore your attention for a faint touch of amusement and diversion to tickle your nerves with a most engrossing discourse regarding the televised play of Pride & Prejudice. In this episode, M. Bingley and M. Darcy settle at Netherfield and engage the Bennet sisters. Mrs. Bennet is reduced to hysterics. Jane takes a cold. Intro music by Kimiko Ishizaka of The Open Goldberg Variations