How did Di die? Don't worry you little royalist cuck, we got you covered. You'll be able to eat off your Princess Di memorial plate in peace knowing what powers were REALLY at play in her untimely demise. 

Also we mention paedophilia quite a lot (obviously) so if you don't want to hear us making libellous remarks about ol' Andy then skip this one babes xoxo

*Sponsored by Jo O'Meara, Denise Van Outen and Michael Gambon's latest cinematic masterpiece. Also featuring an urgent Governmental message*