Welcome to Anchored by Truth brought to you by Crystal Sea Books. In John 14:6, Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life.” The goal of Anchored by Truth is to encourage everyone to grow in the Christian faith by anchoring themselves to the secure truth found in the inspired, inerrant, and infallible word of God.

Script Notes:

Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.

Proverbs, chapter 22, verse 6. English Standard Version

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VK: Hello! Welcome to another episode of Anchored by Truth brought to you by Crystal Sea Books. I’m Victoria K in the studio and today we’re going to continue a series we began last time on Anchored by Truth. We’re calling this series “Raising Christian Kids in a Creepy Culture.” It’s sad that we have to think in terms like this but the simple fact is that we do. Today our culture isn’t just creepy in a lot of ways but it can be downright hostile to helping our children develop their own relationship with Jesus. Parents must make consistent, conscious, and disciplined choices to raise a Christian kid in that creepy culture. And today we’re really happy to have someone in the studio who has done that. In the studio again with us today we have Candy Coates. Candy was a working mom and wife of a successful lawyer and businessman. But, most importantly of all, Candy raised two children who have strong and solid Christian faiths of their own and are building careers and lives for themselves. Candy joined us for an earlier episode on Anchored by Truth where we heard the story of how her upbringing in a small Florida community helped shape her own sturdy faith. We would encourage all Anchored by Truth listeners who missed that episode to go to our website (crystalseabooks.com) and catch her inspiring story. I think Candy’s story emphasizes one simple fact in a very profound way. Candy’s grandparents had a strong Christian faith. Her grandparents imparted that faith to her parents and her parents did that for her. And now Candy has passed that legacy along and we have no doubt that that tree of life that has been so faithfully cultivated will continue to bear fruit in future generations.

And In our last episode of Anchored by Truth we talked with Candy about some ideas that Candy used with her children to help them develop a faith of their own. Candy even did many things with her children before they entered school to begin the building the foundations for their faith. So, today we are going to move forward a few years and talk with her about some of the things that she did with her children when they were in school. Candy, can you give us a general description of how you approached the school years with your kids to both ensure they had a positive school experience but also to ensure their faith kept developing?

Candy: First answer in “bulk” materials.

3:00 VK: Well, I think you’ve made some very important points. First, you’ve stressed the need for parents to be involved with their child’s schools. Especially today, parents can’t just trust that their child’s schools is teaching material that the parent would agree with. Parents have to be aware of the content of the material that is being presented in their kids’ classrooms. Parents also have to be aware of who is teaching their kids and they even need to know who is in school with their kids. As you mentioned in our last episode in this “Raising Christian kids in a creepy culture series” raising a Christian child requires purpose and intention and it requires, as you put it, parents must “show up for work every day because their kids are counting on them.” And it’s not always easy. I liked what you said that “some days it’s going to suck the fillings out of your head.” But the goal of having a child whose faith will withstand the culture’s onslaught is worth it isn’t it? I mean that was one of the real blessings that you experienced growing up. Your parents were very faithful soldiers in God’s army weren’t they?

Candy: answer about parents

5:15 VK: Well, I think that’s a great illustration that your father was very focused on not only the faith of his family but the faith of his community. Your father wanted his community to have a movie theater to provide entertainment for families but he wasn’t willing to allow inappropriate content to come into the community – at least insofar as he could prevent it. Are there other examples you recall about how your father’s faith was reflected in his life?

Candy: Comments about family night at the movie theater.

VK: So, it sounds like even then your father realized how much the entertainment industry could influence people, especially children. And things have changed drastically since your family operated that movie theater in Cross City, haven’t they. We certainly have far more entertainment options than they did in those days. There are a lot more ways that entertainment enters our kids’ lives and comes into our homes. But, sadly, it’s pretty obvious that the moral quality of most of the so-called entertainment has declined significantly. I’ve heard RD who founded Crystal Sea Books say that’s the biggest reason he started a publishing business. The way RD has put it is that “we’re in a race to the bottom and we’re winning.” What do you think your father would say about today’s entertainment if he were in the room with us?

Candy: Comments about father being dismayed.

7:20 VK: How do you think that parents today should be involved with their kids choices of entertainment? It sounds like you agree with your father that kids need to have a parent or other responsible adult involved in helping make decisions about what they consume. This runs so counter to what our culture pushes in its narratives. Culture wants us to believe that kids are just little adults who may have different tastes but they are capable of making acceptable choices. But that is FAR from the truth isn’t it?

Candy: Comments about being parent involved with entertainment choices pushed by culture.

10:15 VK: Candy you were a working mom which meant that you had to balance your work responsibilities with your concern for your kids. It’s obvious that you weren’t just focused on your kids’ health and safety – though that was certainly your top priority – it’s obvious you wanted your kids to grow up with a healthy set of values and with their own Christian faith. So, how did you go about balancing your job responsibilities with your desire to be a faithful Christian mom and wife?

Candy: Comments about work and home responsibilities.

VK: As we seek to raise Christian kids it’s important to be attentive to the child’s developing faith, isn’t it. I think there came in your daughter’s life when she decided it was time for her make a change in her school. Can you tell us about that?

Candy: Comments about daughter going to new school.

12:15 VK: I think one of the big points today in order to raise Christian children is that you must be very conscious of the environment that will surround your children. Right? Culture has shifted a lot in the past few decades and now there are many environments that Christian parents just don’t want their kids to be in. But these unsuitable environments can still be enticing and, frankly, might be the most convenient choice in terms of time or effort. How important is it for parents to be very conscious about the environment their kids are in?

Candy: Comments about environment kids are in.

VK: So, was there something that jumped out at the Christian school that was different from that in the public schools where your son was going at that time?

Candy: Comments about Christian school.

VK: How about discipline? Was there anything that was noticeably different about the discipline in the Christian school that was different from that in the public school?

Candy: Comments about discipline.

VK: Candy, you have said that it’s also very important to know the other kids that your children are spending time with. Just about every parent knows that once kids go off to school their classmates and other kids they meet are going to start being bigger and bigger influences in their lives. There comes a point in many children’s lives where their friends are more important to kids than their families. Some of that is natural but we certainly don’t want it to become detrimental to our kid’s faith or futures. So, you always made it a point to know what your kids were doing didn’t you?

Candy: Comments about tennis team and FCA.

VK: And as a part of knowing what’s going on in your kid’s life and environment that means you have to know their teachers and school very well, doesn’t it?

Candy: Comments about knowing teachers and families of kid’s classmates.

18:00 VK: But of course, no matter how careful you are or try to be unexpected things are going to crop up won’t they. I mean it’s impossible to plan for everything that is going to go on when raising a child. It’s impossible to plan for everything that goes on in life. So, do you have any thoughts about how to handle challenges crop up that you never expect?

Candy: Comments about preparing for challenges.

18:00 VK: And when we go through challenges it can really help to remember that no matter what we are going through that God is sovereign. No matter what is happening to us at the time we know that God is still in charge – and that is true for the lives of our children as well as in our own lives. And we need to come to the point where we not only know that but where we start to take comfort from that knowledge. After all, it’s not much comfort to know that God is in charge if we don’t think that God cares for us – which, of course, He does. But sometimes it’s hard to remember that especially when the big challenges come our way. But is in charge and He knows what’s best even when we don’t understand that at the time. Right?

Candy: Comments about God’s sovereignty – stop, drop, and pray. 22:30

VK: Stop, drop, and pray. I really like that. That’s one of the reasons Crystal Sea has published 2 books on prayer because we believe prayer should be the first response and not the last resort. Well, we’d really like to thank Candy Coates for being our guest on Anchored by Truth today. I think we can all see that one big reason Candy’s children know Jesus and have a genuine love for him is because she has that love and knowledge. Candy’s story is a clear illustration of how sacred scripture –the Bible – continues to demonstrate its supernatural nature through lives that are changed for the better for all eternity by its saving power. Today for our closing prayer how about if we pray that everyone would come to a saving knowledge of the God of the Bible who is our one sure anchor to truth.

---- PRAYER FOR RESTORATION OF THE WORSHIP OF THE ONE TRUE GOD (MARCUS)

VK: We hope you’ll be with us in the future when we’ll continue our discussion with Candy. And we hope you’ll take some time to encourage some friends to tune in too, or listen to the podcast version of this show.

If you’d like to hear more, try out crystalseabooks.com where “We’re not perfect but our Boss is!”

(Bible Quote from the English Standard Version)