In crisis communication, we want to be as helpful to the individual as our knowledge and skills let us, and we can do more than merely filter the individual’s crisis color through our blue screen.

In crisis communication, an important part of our goal is to make our skills and abilities available to the individual.  We have made our mood or tone available to him in a way that helps him calm down and plan ahead.  In the same way, we can make our skills and knowledge available to him in terms of thinking, questioning, considering, and planning.  For example, people caught up in the emotions of crisis are usually trying to think about and concentrate on what to do about the situation.  Their thoughts and ideas about what to do are generally motivated by a very emotional and somewhat confused notion of what happened.  When we ask them What happened?  we are asking them to think more clearly and objectively about what caused them to be so upset or confused.  The question, What happened? gently encourages them to begin to think about this situation in a more reasoning and systematic way.  If they were not so upset, they would probably be figuring out what happened themselves instead of using all their energies thinking about what they are going to do.  Our questions, interest, and calm concern gradually nudge them to use their own thinking and planning skills.  They start out by using our questions, our way of systematically looking at their situations, and our skills at thinking through problems.  Our skills and knowledge are available to them, and they use these as a means of getting in touch with their own skills and knowledge. Basically, we become a part of their communication process, asking questions, giving focus to problems, helping them to be more systematic.

We have all had conversations with someone who goes into great detail as he talks.  He wants, for example, to tell us that he is unable to keep a date he has with us.  The short version of his story is that something unexpected came up.  He calls up to cancel our meeting.  The conversation starts: I got a call yesterday from my mother.  She hasn’t been feeling well.  It probably is a recurrence of an old back injury she received in an automobile accident several years ago.  She was driving her car past a school, when a school bus backed out into her lane of traffic.  Fifteen minutes later, and after having completely exhausted our patience, he tells us that his mother has a doctor’s appointment, and he has to take her.  That is why he will not be able to meet with us. …

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