This week I somehow ended up questioning everything — including my own height. What started as a normal conversation turned into a full existential crisis involving Penguin bars, chocolate-flavour coating, and the price of cocoa beans.

Turns out, a few of our favourite British snacks aren’t what they used to be. Some have been reformulated, relabelled, or quietly downgraded when nobody was looking. Even cheese slices have got in on the act.

From rising cocoa prices to fake ingredients, I try to make sense of what’s real, what’s not, and why we care so much about it in the first place.

Ultimately, though… it probably doesn’t matter.

If it still tastes all right, we’ll eat it anyway

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