From Beyoncé nearly falling from the sky (yes, I was there) to the rise of Labubu as a new financial asset class, this episode is one giant red flag — in the best way. We unpack the mental state of the group chat, decode gym personalities (and why straight men have colonized Pilates), and get into John’s cryptic “I’m leaving social media” texts that were clearly a cry for likes. If the economy doesn’t crash, we just might.

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