Runtime: 1 hour 18 minutes

Welcome back to Triggered but Thriving! In this episode, trauma therapist and Asentriarc founder Sarah Ferland Doherty, RSW, sits down with fellow therapist and best friend Rachel Oliver, RSW—founder of The Emotion Centre and known online as @modern.love.therapist—to talk all things relationships.

Together, they explore what it means to love and be loved from a regulated, secure place. From attachment wounds and nervous-system safety to conflict repair and self-trust, this episode dives deep into how relationships can become both our biggest triggers and our greatest teachers.

If you’ve ever wondered why dating feels so intense, why calm love can feel “boring,” or how to know when a connection is truly safe, this conversation is for you.

Rachel and Sarah unpack:

• Why love is often a “portal” to healing old wounds

• How attachment styles show up in adult relationships

• The difference between emotional and relational intelligence

• Sovereignty: learning to trust your own inner compass

• Nervous-system safety and co-regulation in healthy love

• Conflict repair and accountability

• The balance between healing alone vs. healing in relationship

• Spirituality, abundance mindset, and the energy of dating

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro & Welcome
02:15 Meet Rachel — Background & Why Couples Work
05:30 How Sarah & Rachel Met
10:10 Rachel’s Path to Relationship Work & Intuitive Practice
14:20 Sovereignty & Inner Guidance
19:00 Healing Through Love: The “Portal” Idea
24:45 When Triggers Open in Relationships
29:40 Attachment Wounds & Insecure Patterns
35:10 Couples Therapy 101: “The Relationship is the Client”
39:00 Identity-Based vs. Attachment-Based Triggers
45:10 Defining Healthy Love
50:30 Nervous-System Safety & Co-Regulation
55:10 Self-Abandonment in Relationships
59:30 Intuition vs. Triggers
1:03:00 Conflict, Communication & Accountability
1:08:00 Emotional vs. Relational Intelligence
1:11:30 Healing on Your Own vs. Healing in Relationship
1:14:00 Spirituality, Self-Love & Abundance in Dating
1:16:00 Final Reflections & Next Episode Tease

Rachel Oliver, RSW
Relationship & Couples Therapist
Founder of The Emotion Centre
Instagram: @modern.love.therapist

Up Next: When Triggers Take the Wheel
Learn how to recognize, name, and navigate your triggers, so you can stay grounded, connected, and thriving.