In the Gospels, we get wonderful glimpses of the different kinds of relationships Jesus had. These varying degrees of relationship beg the question, “Do we have to wait to become good friends before we start talking about Jesus with someone?”  The fact is, friendship works. So does friendliness with a stranger I’ll never meet again. Relationship is vital.

Then again, initially it is relationship based on the various ways I communicate with the other person non-verbally, through my heart and character, with authenticity and respect toward him or her as a fellow human being made in the image of God. If I present the Good News without genuine respect for the other person—and without the honest desire to move from strangers to neighbors, and from neighbors to friends—the other person will sense it and know it. And, if the other person already has been offended, hurt, and perhaps even wounded by other so-called “Christians,” anything I say or don’t say, anything I do or don’t do, will only further offend, hurt, and wound that person.

Words matter, but only if my non-verbals and the current state of my heart match up with my words. Do I engage in someone else’s argument in their terms, point for point? Or do I live joyfully filled by the Holy Spirit? The latter is the secret, every time.                       

This is Luis Palau.