John welcomes back Kira Markoff, a mental health therapist and researcher, to discuss the results of her study on mindfulness and romantic partner conflict. Kira shares that her research focused on the correlation between different facets of mindfulness and various conflict behaviours. She found that acting with awareness, intentionality, and non-judgment were key factors in reducing interactional reactivity and domination during conflicts. Kira emphasises the importance of self-awareness, self-compassion, and effective communication in creating healthy and fulfilling relationships. She also highlights the need for boundaries and self-protection when dealing with relationships that may be harmful or unresponsive to mindful approaches. 

KEY TAKEAWAYS

• Acting with awareness, intentionality, and control over our behaviours during conflict can lead to lower levels of interactional reactivity and domination.

• Describing our thoughts and feelings skillfully and mindfully can improve communication and increase the likelihood of compromise in conflicts.

• Non-judgment, both towards ourselves and others, is important in creating a safe and open space for resolving conflicts.

• Taking time for self-soothing and self-care before engaging in conflict discussions can help regulate emotions and promote more productive conversations.

• It is essential to set and maintain healthy boundaries in relationships, prioritising self-protection and well-being when necessary.

BEST MOMENTS

"So my focus was mindfulness and romantic partner relationships." 

"It's important to be able to offer those repair attempts and then for your partner or whoever to be able to accept them." 

"If you're a person who experiences that kind of anxiety, you also need to do that physiological soothing." 

"It's important to know that we can do that for ourselves." 

"It's about finding ways to help soothe yourself so that you can come from a calm and centred place." 

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The Bicycle Affect: https://youtu.be/oO7XZGvdWno

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I am John Kenny, Award Winning Relationship Coach.

Coaching people to experience healthy loving relationships. Having spent a life choosing unhealthy relationships and self sabotaging my own success, I now coach people to live a life they choose.

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