Revel in the Chaos

What happens when two women with ADHD sit down to compare notes? Turns out... the same diagnosis can look completely different.

After sharing my own late ADHD diagnosis in the last episode, I wanted to continue the conversation by talking with another woman whose experience with ADHD looks a little (or a lot) different than mine. She's built a career helping people get organized. I spend way too much time overthinking simple decisions, avoiding tasks, and wondering why my brain works the way it does.

So how do we both have ADHD?

In this episode, we're unpacking what ADHD really looks like beyond the stereotypes. We talk about childhood, late diagnosis, masking, motherhood, relationships, organization, overwhelm, procrastination, perfectionism, and all the invisible ways ADHD shows up in everyday life. Along the way, we laugh, call ourselves out, compare notes, and discover that even when our experiences are different, so many of the feelings underneath are the same.

Whether you have ADHD yourself, love someone who does, or you've ever wondered why your brain seems to work differently, I hope this conversation helps you feel a little more understood and reminds you there's no one "right" way for ADHD to look.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Why the same ADHD diagnosis can look completely different

• The ADHD traits we missed growing up

• Late diagnosis and finally making sense of the past

• Organization, overwhelm, procrastination, and perfectionism

• Motherhood, relationships, and the mental load

• The strengths, struggles, and surprising gifts of an ADHD brain

If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to follow the show, leave a rating or review, or share it with someone who could use this conversation. Thanks for being here.

Resources

[email protected]⁠

⁠Facebook⁠

⁠Instagram

Twin Cities Taskers

I thought I just sucked at being an adult.
Like… why can’t I keep up with basic life things without feeling completely overwhelmed?

Laundry piles up. Emails go unanswered. I avoid the smallest tasks like they’re life-threatening… and then beat myself up for all of it.

I tell myself “I’ll do it tomorrow”… and then tomorrow comes, and somehow it’s worse.

At 38, I was diagnosed with ADHD. And suddenly… it wasn’t just a personality flaw.

In this episode, I’m taking you inside my brain; the constant noise, the overthinking, the decision paralysis, the doom scrolling, the starting everything and finishing nothing… all while looking like a relatively functional adult on the outside.

We’re talking about what ADHD actually looks like in women, why it gets missed for so long, and how it shows up in real life: parenting, relationships, responsibilities, and just trying to keep up.

And the relief of finally having answers… along with the grief of realizing how long I went without them.

If you’ve ever thought, “What is wrong with me?" or "Why can't I just get my life together?" this might explain more than you think.

👉🏼 In this episode, I talk about:

• What ADHD actually looks like in women (especially inattentive type)
• Why it’s often missed or misdiagnosed as anxiety or depression
• What daily life feels like (overwhelm, paralysis, procrastination)
• How it impacts parenting, relationships, and self-worth
• The relief—and grief—that comes with a late diagnosis

CHAPTERS

00:00 Understanding ADHD: A Personal Journey

06:49 Inside the ADHD Mind: Chaos and Clarity

15:00 Neurodivergence vs. Neurotypical: A Deeper Look

21:47 The Overlap of ADHD, Anxiety, and Depression

28:32 Executive Functioning: The Daily Struggle

34:06 Distraction Spirals and Task Overload

38:42 Time Blindness and Rushing Through Life

42:47 People-Pleasing Tendencies and Emotional Sensitivity

50:47 Reflections on Life Before and After Medication

53:40 The Positive Aspects of ADHD

58:17 Understanding Different Operating Systems of ADHD

In this episode of Revel in the Chaos, I’m talking about friendship through every season of life, how it starts, how it changes, how it sometimes falls apart, and how it can save us when life gets heavy. From childhood friendships and messy teenage years to motherhood, loss, and the chaos of midlife, this episode is a love letter to the people who walk beside us, loudly, quietly, imperfectly.

We’ll talk about:

• Why friendship is essential at every stage of life

• How to maintain and nourish friendships when everyone is busy

• How to know when to keep investing, and when to let go

• Making new friends as an adult (even when it feels awkward AF)

• What real support actually looks like

• Why one good friend can change the quality of your entire life

This episode is deeply personal, honest, and inclusive, whether you have a big group of friends, one close friend, or you’re still searching for your people. Because no matter the season you’re in, you’re not meant to go through it alone.

CHAPTERS

00:00 Welcome Back and Season Two Preview

07:20 The Importance of Friendships

08:17 Navigating Midlife Friendships

16:41 Friendships as Chosen Family

17:32 The Nature of Friendship

20:25 Navigating Friendship Changes

25:31 Making New Friends in Adulthood

31:56 Effort in Maintaining Friendships

36:19 The Importance of Supportive Friendships

38:55 Friendship in Motherhood

41:17 Quality Over Quantity in Friendships

ORACLE CARD PULL

Deck: Wisdom of The Oracle, By Collette Baron-Reid

Card: Treasure Island (Pulled in the protection position)

Essential Meaning: “The Law Of Attraction bringing dreams into fruition; the results of positive thinking made manifest; abundance appearing as if from nowhere; financial gains and the sharing of good fortune.”

Protection Message: “Poverty consciousness and a sense of “not enough” can cast a shadow on your path. These ideas and core beliefs come with a high cost. Do you really want to proclaim yourself a victim of disappointment and failed expectations? Are you avoiding success because you will grow so tall that others may want to cut you down? Or is it possible that you are caught in a fear that you will lose what you have acquired, so you hold on so tight that you miss the opportunities to expand? You are being challenged to change the way you see the world and move from a perception of limitations to a perception of abundance. Take a risk, for you have nothing to lose except your confinement in a prison of your own making. Open the door and find the abundance waiting for you to claim it.”

CONTACT:

[email protected]

Instagram: @revelinthechaos_official

Facebook: Revel in the Chaos

Ever feel like the rules in your relationship don’t actually apply to both of you? In this episode, Tara Schifsky dives headfirst into the uncomfortable, but all-too-common, world of double standards and privilege in relationships. From parenting to day-to-day dynamics, she shares brutally honest personal stories and insights from friends, exposing how these imbalances can quietly (or not so quietly) chip away at your energy, patience, and sanity.

With a little humor and zero sugarcoating, Tara challenges listeners to ask themselves: Are you playing by the same rules as your partner?

CONTACT:

[email protected]

Facebook

Instagram

CHAPTERS

00:00 Introduction to Double Standards in Relationships

05:08 Personal Experiences with Double Standards

11:01 The Impact of Privilege in Parenting

15:09 Communication Gaps and Their Consequences

20:01 Navigating Imbalances in Work and Home Life

25:12 Overcoming People-Pleasing Tendencies

25:39 Navigating Conflict Avoidance

27:23 The Struggle for Personal Time

30:00 Double Standards in Emotional Expression

33:00 The Burden of Parenting Expectations

37:09 Family Dynamics and Planning Responsibilities

41:08 Hobbies and Personal Freedom

44:14 Societal Double Standards in Parenting

47:19 Reflections on Privilege and Relationships

52:22 Personal Reflections and Closing Thoughts

In this raw and unfiltered episode of Revel in the Chaos, Tara Schifsky opens up about the brutal reality of postpartum depression and anxiety—the messy, isolating, and often shame-filled side of motherhood that no one warns you about. Tara doesn’t sugarcoat it. She takes you through the darkest corners of her experience, the breaking points that forced her to ask for help, and the hard-won lessons that cracked her open in ways she never saw coming. This is more than a story about surviving postpartum—it’s about reclaiming yourself, finding strength in vulnerability, and smashing the unrealistic expectations placed on moms. If you’ve ever felt lost in the chaos of motherhood, this one’s for you.

CONTACT

Instagram: ⁠@revelinthechaos_official⁠

Facebook: ⁠Revel in the Chaos⁠

Email: [email protected]

RESOURCES

PostpartumDepression.org

Postpartum Support International

National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI)

Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: Call or Text 988

CHAPTERS

00:00 Introduction and Reflection on Previous Episode

05:57 The Struggles of Postpartum Depression

11:51 Seeking Help and Finding Relief

18:10 The Transformation of Self-Identity

23:59 Navigating Motherhood and Mental Health

30:01 Grief and Acceptance in Motherhood

35:54 Support and Connection with Other Moms

41:52 Empathy and Reaching Out to Others

KEYWORDS

postpartum depression, mental health, motherhood, self-identity, support, anxiety, healing, intrusive thoughts, emotional well-being, parenting

In this deeply personal episode of Revel in the Chaos, host Tara Schifsky shares her firsthand experience with postpartum depression and anxiety — a topic that is still widely misunderstood and too often left unspoken. Tara opens up about the emotional and psychological toll that followed the birth of her child, describing the overwhelming darkness, disconnection and shame that crept in when she expected joy. This isn’t just a story about the “baby blues”—it’s a raw look at a serious mental health condition that affects 1 in 7 women, yet remains heavily stigmatized. With unflinching honesty, Tara recounts the moments that broke her, the silence that isolated her, and the strength it took to start speaking the truth out loud. This is part one of her journey—a conversation that sheds light on the very real struggle so many mothers face but rarely feel safe enough to admit. Whether you've lived through it, love someone who has, or want to understand what postpartum depression and anxiety really looks like, this episode will open your heart and your eyes.

CONTACT:

• Email: [email protected]
• Instagram: revelinthechaos_official
• Facebook: Revel in the Chaos

In this episode of Revel in the Chaos, Tara Schifsky takes a hard look at the burnout culture plaguing millennial moms. With humor and vulnerability, she shares her experiences navigating the relentless overstimulation that often leads to feelings of rage and dissociation. Tara delves into the unrealistic expectations that come with motherhood and how they contribute to a cycle of exhaustion and overwhelm. She emphasizes the crucial role of communication and support systems in combating burnout, reminding us that we can’t do it all. With a focus on setting boundaries and prioritizing self-care, Tara encourages listeners to reclaim their sanity in the chaos. So join her as she addresses the trials of millennial motherhood, all while sipping on a cup of lukewarm coffee and trying to find balance in a world that constantly demands more.

CONTACT and SOCIALS

Email: [email protected]

Insta: @revelinthechaos_official

FB: Revel in the Chaos

CHAPTERS

00:00 Introduction and Life Updates

05:28 The Pressure of Societal Expectations

06:27 Navigating Overstimulation and Burnout

09:45 Understanding Overstimulation

12:06 Mom Rage and Emotional Overload

24:35 Coping Mechanisms and Mental Health

28:50 Embracing the Chaos of Motherhood

35:37 Navigating Overstimulation and Overwhelm

39:28 Communication as a Key to Connection

48:38 Self-Care and Setting Boundaries

55:25 Finding Balance in a Noisy World

KEYWORDS

motherhood, overstimulation, parenting, mental health, self-care, societal expectations, communication, burnout, coping strategies, family dynamics

Being the default parent isn’t just a title—it’s a full-time, unpaid, and often unappreciated gig. In this episode of Revel in the Chaos, Tara Schifsky rips the curtain off the invisible workload that keeps households running while leaving parents (mostly moms) running on fumes. From the guilt trips to the double standards, she gets real about the emotional toll, the unspoken expectations, and the constant mental juggling act. But it’s not all school drop-offs and snack wars —Tara also dives into reclaiming balance, setting boundaries, and finding the power in owning the role (without letting it own you). Tune in for a brutally honest, slightly cathartic, and refreshingly unapologetic take on the reality of being the “default” parent.

TAKEAWAYS

• The podcast addresses the often unspoken challenges of parenting.
• Tara shares humorous anecdotes about her children's funny remarks.
• Being the default parent comes with an invisible workload that is exhausting.
• The pressure to perform and maintain a perfect household can lead to guilt.
• Tara discusses the double standards in parenting roles between partners.
• Open communication within the family is essential for addressing imbalances.
• Setting boundaries is crucial for managing the overwhelming responsibilities of parenting.
• It's important to recognize and appreciate the role of the default parent.
• Tara emphasizes that it's okay to feel overwhelmed and seek help.
• Finding joy in parenting amidst the chaos is possible.

CONTACT

Instagram: @revelinthechaos_official

Facebook: Revel in the Chaos

Email: [email protected]

CHAPTERS

00:00 Introduction to the Chaos

02:11 The Default Parent Dilemma

09:29 The Invisible Workload

14:49 Navigating Guilt and Expectations

17:43 Understanding the Default Parent Role

21:57 Planning and Preparation for Trips

24:25 Navigating Travel and Freedom in Relationships

27:30 The Double Standards of Parenting

31:50 The Invisible Workload of the Default Parent

39:32 Creating Balance and Equity in Family Responsibilities

43:49 Embracing the Role of the Default Parent

KEYWORDS

parenting, motherhood, default parent, mental health, family dynamics, parenting struggles, work-life balance, guilt, parenting humor, family responsibilities

In this episode of Revel in the Chaos, Tara Schifsky opens up about the hidden struggles of being the default parent—the constant mental load, the overwhelming responsibilities, and the emotional toll that often goes unnoticed. From self-doubt and anxiety to the relentless juggling of family life, Tara shares her personal journey of navigating the invisible workload that shapes motherhood. She delves into the importance of carving out time for gratitude, self-care, and better communication within family dynamics. With a powerful call to action, Tara encourages listeners to reflect on their own experiences and start a conversation about how we can better support the unsung heroes in our homes.

Contact:

Share your thoughts on this episode! Or reach out to suggest a new topic:

Email: [email protected]

Instagram: @revelinthechaos_official

Facebook: Revel in the Chaos

Chapters:

00:00 Introduction and Gratitude

01:08 Navigating Self-Doubt and Anxiety

04:00 The Importance of Downtime

08:42 Understanding the Invisible Workload

12:56 Defining the Default Parent

19:39 The Burden of the Invisible Workload

25:26 Communication and Partnership Dynamics

28:50 Balancing Personal Needs and Parenting Responsibilities

32:13 Conclusion and Call to Action

In this episode, Tara delves deeper into the topic of people pleasing, exploring its roots in trauma, grief, and narcissism. She shares her personal experiences and the impact these factors have had on her identity. Tara emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries, learning to say no, and expressing one's needs as essential steps in the recovery process. She encourages listeners to prioritize self-discovery and self-worth, ultimately aiming to empower themselves and break the cycle of people pleasing for future generations.

Contact and Sharing

I would love to hear from you! Leave a comment or send me a message via email or social media.

Email: [email protected]

Instagram: @revelinthechaos_official

Facebook: Revel in the Chaos

Please like, share, follow, subscribe... all the things that will help me reach more people who could benefit from our conversations on Revel in the Chaos. Thank you.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Podcast Journey

05:04 Exploring People Pleasing: Part Two

07:26 The Impact of Trauma and Grief

15:25 Narcissism and People Pleasing

17:40 Recovering from People Pleasing

24:21 Setting Boundaries and Saying No

31:10 Expressing Needs and Feelings

33:30 Final Thoughts and Encouragement

Keywords

people pleasing, trauma, grief, narcissism, boundaries, self-discovery, mental health, personal growth, self-worth, empowerment