When faith, family, and finances collide, elders can become vulnerable in ways they never expected. In this episode of Plan for This, Marguerite and Ron share the story of Dolores, a 78 year old widow whose increasing church gifts and pastor recommended reverse mortgage left her exposed when a serious accident changed everything.

As her son Gary steps in to help, Marguerite walks through the real reverse mortgage risks that often get glossed over, from high upfront costs to eroding home equity and forced sale when someone can no longer live in their house. She explains why big financial decisions should never be made on the advice of a single voice, and why elders need a team that includes a CPA, estate planning attorney, and, when needed, a professional fiduciary.

Later, a PlanFan asks what to do with extra GoFundMe money after a daughter’s health improves. Marguerite and Ron explore tax issues, ethical questions, and creative “pay it forward” options that still respect the intent of donors.

Welcome to the *Plan for This Podcast*—your trusted source for estate planning, wills, trusts, caregiving, and financial preparedness.

Hosted by Marguerite Lorenz and Ron Greenwald, we simplify complex topics into clear, actionable steps that help you protect what matters most.

📌 In this episode:

00:00 – Opening: giving, generosity, and how cons really work

00:40 – Show intro and theme: “Did you pray for this, or did you miss?”

01:18 – Meet Gary and Dolores, her church life, and missed family holidays

02:05 – The accident, the pastor as emergency contact, and moving in with Gary

03:15 – Discovering Dolores’s tithes and the pastor recommended reverse mortgage

04:03 – Is this financial elder abuse, or is Dolores simply making choices

04:50 – Where pastors and faith leaders should (and should not) get involved

05:11 – Reverse mortgages as serious financial products, not quick fixes

05:42 – The real costs: fees, compounding interest, and borrowing from yourself

06:05 – Marguerite’s case story: a reverse mortgage months before an elder’s passing

07:31 – Health information, honesty, and the need for holistic planning

08:24 – Why a neutral CPA or advisor should read the reverse mortgage contract

09:14 – Fine print, senior living contracts, and the value of professional review

09:40 – Back to Gary: where has he been, and how much should adult children know

10:33 – “None of my kids’ business” and why elders still need a team

11:22 – Talking about tithing with a neutral third party instead of alone

11:44 – Shame, scams, and why cons rely on secrecy and embarrassment

12:32 – Is Gary really in charge, or does the pastor still hold authority

13:10 – Health care agents, hospital forms, and matching documents to the plan

14:21 – Practical steps: sharing your healthcare directive with your doctor and hospital

15:21 – If Dolores never plans, Gary could end up in probate court

16:25 – Independence versus logistics, planning while you are still clear

17:12 – Clergy, donations, and the line between generosity and exploitation

18:27 – Reverse mortgage basics: age, staying in the home, and care costs

19:36 – What happens when you can no longer live in the home

20:40 – Equity erosion, compounding interest, and forced sale scenarios

21:06 – Dolores’s likely shortfall and the importance of building a care team now

22:08 – How Gary can start the conversation: get your own estate plan first

23:22 – Marguerite’s personal story about her father and blended family planning

26:10 – Fiduciary duty, conflict of interest, and being honest about money thoughts

29:21 – Bringing it back to Gary: can he serve if the church inherits everything

31:21 – Building a team that may or may not include family members

31:47 – PlanFan invitation: share stories, comment, and anonymize if needed

32:28 – Sponsor mentions: Independent Trustee Alliance and Estate Sale Warehouse

33:18 – PlanFan question: extra GoFundMe funds after daughter’s cancer remission

34:04 – What “extra cash” really means, and options for paying it forward

35:12 – Tax questions, CPAs, and donor deductibility issues

36:09 – No perfect answer, more questions, and the power of honest community

37:08 – Closing reflections and reminder to plan for your own future

✨ What You’ll Learn on This Channel:

- Estate planning basics (wills, trusts, probate, and more)

- Executor and trustee responsibilities explained

- Family caregiving, financial preparedness, and legacy planning

- Real stories, expert insights, and practical tools

👉 Subscribe for weekly episodes: @PlanForthis

👉 Join our PlanFan community: https://planforthis.com/

Because when life asks, *“Did you plan for this?”*—you’ll be ready.

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