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In this moving episode, Michelle talks with Robert DeLena about his journey parenting his son, Ryan. They discuss the evolution of a "strong-willed" child into a professional outdoor adventurer, the pitfalls of early 2000s behavioral interventions, and how a chance trip to a ski hill changed their lives forever.

Robert shares a raw, honest perspective on moving past clinical labels and restrictive protocols to find the environment where his son could finally thrive.

Robert shares:

• The Trap of "High Strengths, Deep Weaknesses": How early neuropsychology flagged Ryan as "imbalanced," leading to a cycle of therapeutic schools that focused more on managing behavior than understanding the child.
• The Trauma of Restraint: A candid look at the early days of ABA and "holds." Robert discusses the PTSD and physical toll these interventions took on Ryan and the family before they decided to walk away.
• The Power of Environment: Why Ryan, who "relished disobeying" in a rigid classroom, became a focused leader on a mountain.
• Unraveling the Meds: The long process of questioning psychiatric diagnoses (like Bipolar disorder) and realizing that some behaviors were responses to environment and over-medication rather than inherent traits.
• The "Graveyard of Failed Attempts": Why traditional hobbies like baseball or piano often end in tears for complex kids, and the importance of cutting your losses until you find the "spark."
• Sibling Dynamics: The "jealousy factor" for siblings who don't act out and how the intensity of supporting a complex child can unintentionally sideline others in the family.
• From "At-Risk" to Professional Guide: How Ryan went from needing a one-to-one aide to go to the bathroom to living independently in a van and guiding kids on dangerous rock faces.

Quote to Tape on the Fridge: “If your instincts tell you that you know something the doctors don't, you don't have to listen. Trust your gut.”

👤 About Robert C. DeLena
Robert DeLena is an author and parent advocate who transitioned from a "Type A" rigid parenting style to one centered on autonomy and adventure. He is the author of Without Restraint, a dual-perspective memoir written alongside his son, Ryan, detailing their journey through the mental health system to the mountains of the world.

🔗 Connect with Robert DeLena

• Facebook: Robert C. DeLena
• Instagram: @robert.delena
• LinkedIn: Robert C. DeLena
• Follow Ryan’s Adventures: Instagram @ExtremeRyan