We are finally at the halfway point, and our three kingdoms have emerged for sure. You could argue they already had, but now they have names and everything, it's a proper showdown. Hello, Ma Chao, unparalleled warrior. Goodbye, Ma Chao, unparalleled warrior. The Riverlands offer themselves to Xuande on a dishonorably silver platter. Cao Cao cuts off his beard. New friend Zhang Song is the most useless diplomat I can imagine. We got it all.

If you want to contact us on Twitter, Em is at @em_being, Jackson is at @headfallsoff, Jen is at @jbu3, and Six is at @sixdettmar. Our art is made by @saltysprout! The intro music for this episode is the fourth track from Romance of the Three Kingdoms VI: Awakening of the Dragon, and the outro music is Cao Cao's Theme from Romance of the Three Kingdoms XIII.