This week, Shu and Wei are at each other's throats nonstop. Sun Quan declares himself emperor, then watches the other two kingdoms fight while eating popcorn. Sima Yi ALMOST does it with a WILD plan (just stand. don't chase.) but his generals can't quite pull it off. The chapter title of 99 straight up lies about what happens in that chapter, and the shine continues to fall off the Kongming train.

RIP to Zhao Zilong, a fuckin real one.

If you want to contact us on Twitter, Em is at @em_being, Jackson is at @headfallsoff, Jen is at @jbu3, and Six is at @sixdettmar. Our art is made by @saltysprout! The intro music for this episode is The Battle on the Phoenix Height from the 2008 film Three Kingdoms: Resurrection of the Dragon, and our outtro music is Harvest from Romance of the Three Kingdoms X. The Kingdom News bumper is from Strong Bad Email #89.