While society often focuses on what women need to feel romantic, men have their own unique “wiring” that requires understanding. In this episode, Stan explores the “waffle” mindset—the idea that men process life in distinct, compartmentalized boxes—and how women can successfully navigate those spaces to build a stronger marriage.

The Power of Presence: Stan tells a humorous story about inviting Cynthia to his basketball and baseball games. Even if she was busy talking to other wives or playing with their son in the grass, the simple act of her showing up was a form of support. Ladies, your man might not say it, but having his “cheerleader” in the corner makes him feel like a winner.

Respect is a Love Language: For many men, feeling respected is synonymous with feeling loved. Verbalizing gratitude for his hard work—whether he’s fixing a car, raking the yard, or leading the family—goes a long way in making him feel “cherished” rather than taken for granted.

Side-by-Side Connection: Men often bond through shared activities. Whether it’s watching a movie together (even if you fall asleep!) or simply being near each other while pursuing hobbies, that “side-by-side” time builds a romantic connection.

The Gift of Peace: Stan emphasizes that the world is a battlefield for men. When he comes home, he isn’t looking for another fight; he’s looking for nurturing and peace. Being a source of rest for your husband is one of the most romantic acts of service you can provide.

Physical Affection: Non-sexual touch—like a hug from behind or resting your head on his shoulder—is highly valued and makes a man feel secure.

Direct Communication: Skip the three-page explanation! Men appreciate getting straight to the point. Clear, honest, and brief communication is “waffle-friendly.”

Visual Appreciation: Since men are often visual, Stan notes that making an effort to look attractive for your spouse (including spontaneous lingerie) is a powerful way to show him he is still desired.

Create a Safe Space: Be the person he can be emotionally vulnerable with without fear of judgment or having his spirit crushed.

Marriage is a two-way street of research and growth. Just as men must learn the “spaghetti” complexity of their wives’ emotions, women thrive when they understand the “waffle” need for respect and peace. When you learn to “sharpen” one another, you move closer to the “one flesh” unity God intended.