Unraveling Me

S1E16 Unraveling Cassandra


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S1 E16 – Unraveling Cassandra - This episode is a powerful meditation on truth, belonging, and the slow work of integration. She reminds us that identity isn’t rebuilt overnight—and that learning who you are is often a lifelong process, especially when the truth arrives after everything else is already in motion.


Cassandra’s story begins on what she calls her “re-birthday”—the night a DNA test revealed the truth about her origins and quietly dismantled everything she thought she knew about herself. What followed wasn’t a single moment of realization, but years of unraveling, re-integration, and learning how to live honestly inside a body that suddenly held a different history.

 

In this deeply reflective conversation, Kara and Cassandra explore how donor conception, secrecy, and late discovery reshape identity—not just intellectually, but emotionally, relationally, and culturally.


SHOW NOTES 

Kara and Cassandra discuss:

  • The shock of realizing the story of her conception was never disclosed
  • Navigating parental secrecy and the emotional aftermath of planned silence
  • Meeting her genetic father and donor-conceived siblings
  • The life changing impact of learning she is half Ashkenazi Jewish
  • Grief for a cultural inheritance hidden from your childhood—and the pull to reclaim it
  • Rebuilding identity after truth arrives late

 

Cassandra speaks with care for everyone involved, even as she names the cost of secrecy and delayed truth.



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Unraveling MeBy Kara Rubinstein-Deyerin & Alan Katz