1E17 – Unraveling Melanie - This episode is a powerful reflection on identity, race, motherhood, and resilience—and on what it takes to keep going, even when the road home is one you have to build yourself.

Melanie was adopted at birth into a white, religious family in the segregated American South. Raised as a transracial adoptee in a household shaped by silence, fear, and rigid expectations, she learned early that survival often meant obedience—and that questions about identity, race, and origin were not welcome. In this candid and powerful conversation, Kara and Melanie explore how adoption, religion, racial isolation, and secrecy intersected to shape Melanie’s childhood and sense of self. 

SHOW NOTES

Kara and Melanie discuss:

• Growing up transracially adopted in the Jim Crow South
• Religious trauma, saviorism, and adoption as status
• Living in a home where fear replaced safety
• The impact of growing up without genetic mirroring
• Teenage motherhood without protection or guidance
• Experiencing abandonment by systems meant to help
• Finding survival and belonging through the support of other women
• Using DNA testing to search for answers and connection
• Navigating reunion, rejection, and loss
• Reclaiming identity, education, and voice later in life
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Melanie speaks with honesty and clarity—naming harm without minimizing it and holding complexity without excusing silence. Her story reminds us that unraveling is rarely a single moment of discovery, but a lifelong process of learning to belong to yourself when belonging was never made safe.

Everyone has the right to know the truth about where they come from. Unraveling Me speaks to those people impacted by DNA surprises, NPEs (non-paternal event), adoption, assisted reproduction, and other revelations that their parentage isn't entirely what they thought. Having experienced an NPE herself, Kara (through Right To Know and this podcast) seeks to highlight those moments when we learn the most unsettling of secret—who we really are.

At Right To Know, we encourage engagement to facilitate and create real change. As an organization, we are inclusive. We assist adoptees, the donor-conceived community, people with an NPE, birth parents, gamete providers, new genetic family, recipient parents, raising families, and significant others. In learning and growing from each other, we must put the voices of adoptees, donor conceived, and people with an NPE first.

For more information about Right To Know - or if you have a story you want to tell - please visit us at https://righttoknow.us/.

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