Savage Lovecast

She slept with a lad who didn't wear a condom when he said he would, came inside her and wouldn't help pay for Plan B. The hitch? He's great in bed, and she is hard up. Should she sleep with him again, if he promises to be a good boy? 

A caller challenges Dan on his personal dislike of massages. "How can this possibly be?" asks the caller.  

Our guest this week, is the brilliant psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author Esther Perel. Dan and Esther talk about infidelity, how monogamous relationships can turn into police states, and the difference between sex and eroticism- among many other things. We put a chunk of this conversation on the Micro, but there's a lot more on the Magnum. 

It's the classic bait n' switch. A queer man met his wife via Feeld where she claimed to be interested adventurous sex. Now that they're married, they are monogamous, vanilla and the caller is tearing his hair out. They are doing all the therapy. What they aren't doing is having amazing kinky sex. 

[email protected] 206-302-2064

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 25% off all mattress orders AND two free pillows! Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. 

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

This episode is brought to you by Dipsea: an app full of hundreds of short, sexy audio stories designed by women for women. Get an extended 30 day free trial when you go to dipseastories.com/savage. 

Oh no! He broke the flirting rules. He kissed a lady and lied about it. (He lies a lot apparently.) But now, it makes her sick to look at him. What now?

A man and his boyfriend just bought a house together and they are setting up one of the rooms as a nursery...because they are both adult babies. What should they tell visitors if they ask what the locked room is for?

On the Magnum, it's the triumphant return of "What Are You Doing?!" A cuckold relationship with a femme-dom twist, you say? Do tell! Meet John and Maria, a seemingly "normal" couple that get super-freaky where it counts. They explain how they met, and gradually morphed into an amped-up sexual relationship. If you are interested in cuckolding, Dom/sub relationships or just want to peer in, have a listen.

And, a woman heard that if her husband gets a vasectomy his semen will lose the delicious flavor she so enjoys. Is it true? Or maybe...not?

Let's ask science!

A man and his girlfriend are well-matched. Except...she doesn't like to kiss and he NEEDS to kiss to get his erotic motor running. Whatever can they do? 

The good doctor Barak is back... but this time he's here to share his political giving strategy for this election, where your dollar is mightier than ever. And of course Dan ambushes him with a gnarly sex question. 

On the Magnum, what happens when a man is jealous of his...mother? Dan chats with whip smart writer Jill Filipovic about millennial/boomer divide and the seething resentments within. 

And, a man and his husband are finally having three-ways after 30 years of marriage. They get more excited to be with their special guest stars than they do with just each other. Is this a problem? 

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 25% off all mattress orders AND two free pillows! Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. 

We’re partnering with NOCD to raise awareness about OCD. Imagine having unwanted thoughts about your relationship stuck in your head all day no matter how hard you try to make them go away. That’s OCD. Breaking the OCD cycle takes effective treatment. Go to NOCD.com/savage to learn more.

Git along little doggie! A gay man in academia has always been into cowboys. But he fights his brain, due to the inherently problematic nature of this fetish. Can (or should) he scrub these fantasies from his mind? 

A woman in Berlin would like to go to Folsom Europe. But would she be welcome? Dan chats with kink educator AJ Berlin about gay male sex party spaces, and who is (and isn't) welcome. 

On the Magnum, Dan chats with a true unicorn- a monogamous gay man. Don Martin is an author, podcaster and prolific THIRST TRAPPER. He's been with his husband for 18 years in a very happy exclusive relationship. They talk about accepting yourself as gay, going the distance with monogamy, escaping body dysmorphia and so much more. They had a wide-ranging conversation and you are invited to listen in. 

And, are there any foot fetishists out there who are ladies? Anyone? 

Call! Tell us about it! 

This episode is brought to you by Dipsea: an app full of hundreds of short, sexy audio stories designed by women for women. Get an extended 30 day free trial when you go to dipseastories.com/savage. 

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace- online therapy that makes it easy to get extra mental health support. For $80 off your first month, go to Talkspace.com/Savage, and use the offer code Space80.

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

Workplace intrigue ahoy! A gay trans man who passes completely, is out to some of his co-workers but not all. Over drinks, one of his bosses told him he was bi, but not attracted to male genitals. So was this his way of acknowledging that the caller is trans, and flirting with him? Or was it cluelessly his way of saying he *wasn't* interested? Confusing! What should the caller do? 

A straight man loved giving his previous girlfriend multiple orgasms. But now that he's single and knows how good it can be, he feels pressure to give multiple orgasms every time, to all his lovers. Is this a new expectation for men? How can he have good sex without his self-critical brain ruining everything? 

On the Magnum, you may recall a few weeks ago, a woman asked about cross-dressing men. She wanted to understand the difference between cross-dressers, trans women and drag queens. Nancy Rose is a cross-dresser with a very masculine side when she's in man mode and a very feminine side when she's in "Nancy mode." In this conversation they explore the mushy Venn diagram of these queer identities. 

We know you're sick of hearing this question over and over, but if you are an adult baby diaper lover, and a recovering meth addict, and you've discovered that injecting meth into your penis shrinks your dick in a way you find affirming, how can you find a better, less addicting way to achieve a baby-like wiener? Ho hum. 

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 25% off all mattress orders AND two free pillows! Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. 

This episode is brought to you by Hims, providing affordable access to ED treatment, online. Start your free online visit today at Hims.com/Savage.

A woman is starting up a new relationship. Her previous boyfriend was a dom who introduced her to kink. She loved it but found it all too contrived. How can she take the parts of Dom/sub dynamics she likes and leave the scripted parts behind?

It used to take her soooooo long to come. But then she discovered suction toys, and blam! Her husband learned how to get her off orally, but then they divorced. Now she's back to square one and worries it will take another 6 years to train new lovers to get her off. How can she give them a crash course in how her body works? 

On the Magnum, a severe strain of Mpox is on the rise in Africa. Dan brings back the wise and calm Dr. Carlton to discuss this and other anal health issues. Dr. Carlton shares his handy, (if sacriligious) technique to open up for anal sex without poppers. And they spell out use of Truvada, Doxy Pep and other meds on the scene. If you use your butt for sex, you'll want to tune in.

A single mother and breast cancer survivor needs a little cash. She would like to set up an OnlyFans account, but worries that the scars from her mastectomy will hinder her chances or attract unwanted fetishists. Should she do this? 

Find Dr. Carlton:

Instagram, Threads and Tik Tok @DoctorCarlton

X: @Doctor_Carlton

Podcast: Butt Honestly with all social handles @butthonestlypod

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

We’re partnering with NOCD to raise awareness about OCD. Imagine having unwanted thoughts about your relationship stuck in your head all day no matter how hard you try to make them go away. That’s OCD. Breaking the OCD cycle takes effective treatment. Go to NOCD.com/savage to learn more.

A straight man was horrified to discover that he wasn't attracted to his hook-up when she took her clothes off. She extracted a confession from him, and he was honest about his sudden repulsion. Was this the right thing to do? 

A woman would like to help her 70 year-old mother choose and navigate dating apps. Dan calls up Joan Price, author of Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex to give the run-down.

On the Magnum, Dan chats with our new favorite dom- "The Funny Dom," a 24/7 Daddy Dominant based in Melbourne, Australia. They discuss how to vet a dom, how straight male doms come under more scrutiny than femme doms, and how kink employs creativity to process trauma into something wonderful, cathartic

and sexy. We love the Funny Dom and so will you. 

And, can we talk about celery juice? Does it make come taste sweet?

[email protected] 206-302-2064

This episode is brought to you by Dipsea: an app full of hundreds of short, sexy audio stories designed by women for women. Get an extended 30 day free trial when you go to dipseastories.com/savage. 

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders AND two free pillows! Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. 

Get a 4-week trial, free postage, and a digital scale at https://www.stamps.com/savage. Thanks to Stamps.com for sponsoring the show!

We start the show with a simple question. Should she sleep with the gardener? Her marriage has become sexless, and though her husband swears he would be into a three-way, she wants to audition the hot gardener first. 

Some questions require a medical opinion. Some questions are so gnarly that only the most intrepid medical experts will suffice. There is only one man who can fill this role. And that man is Doc Barak. 

On the Magnum, Dan brings on your next favorite guest, Jeff Guenther a.k.a "TherapyJeff." His new book, Big Dating Energy is out now. They talk about dating apps, scheduled sex and how capitalism destroys relationships, Also, Dan self-diagnoses his attachment style, and Jeff makes a sacred promise.

And, a near virgin has asked our brave caller if she would relieve him of his virginity. She thinks it could be fun and a mikvah. But is there anything she should be aware of or look out for? 

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace- online therapy that makes it easy to get extra mental health support. For $80 off your first month, go to Talkspace.com/Savage, and use the offer code Space80.

This episode is brought to you by Hims, providing affordable access to ED treatment, online. Start your free online visit today at Hims.com/Savage.

Hear the modern tale of the single mom, who is so committed to raising a "theybie" that she won't let her best friend babysit, lest she take a peek down below while changing diapers. 

A woman is worried about her brother. He has been sober for a couple years after a traumatic childhood. Now he is dating a woman who just broke up with his pal, who still drinks. They are keeping their relationship under wraps. Will the secrecy and sordid nature of it all suck him back into using? 

On the Magnum, do you like your comedy dry? Dan brings on stand-up comedian Emily Catalano to talk about the orgasm gap, intentionally bad blowjobs, and the quirkiness of releasing a comedy album on vinyl.

And, a rumination on crossdressers: What is the difference between crossdressers, drag queens and trans women? Dan breaks it down. And to all the crossdressers out there- we want to hear from you!

[email protected]    206-302-2064

Foria is an all natural health & sexual wellness company with product lines using the power of plant actives & CBD to effectively enhance intimacy, sexual pleasure, daily wellbeing, and relief from discomfort. Get 20% off your first order by visiting ForiaWellness.com/Savage

Get a 4-week trial, free postage, and a digital scale at https://www.stamps.com/savage. Thanks to Stamps.com for sponsoring the show!

A woman with the best intentions wants to secretly hire a sex worker for her depressed, newly divorced friend. Any downsides here?

Speaking of divorce, Dan gives a long pep-talk to a man struggling with how to get over his. 

On the Magnum, Dan chats with Dr. Sara Glass, author of the fantastic memoir "Kissing Girls on Shabbat." Dr. Glass was raised in a hyper- religious Hasidic Jewish community. She later came out as queer and completely changed her life. Dan and Dr. Glass had a raw, heart-felt conversation talking about the zap religion can put on a child's head, and how coming out is difficult but so worthwhile. 

And, a 16 year-old boy is eager to get into the pup lifestyle/community. But he can't join most of these spaces because of his age. What can he do besides wait and howl at the moon? 

[email protected]    206-302-2064

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. For the month of May, Helix is offering up to 30% off all mattress orders AND two free pillows! Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now.