This is Drabbletober, the podcast of tiny fiction.

Hello, and welcome to Drabbletober. This is episode 24, season 2, for Friday the twenty-fourth of October 2025. I'm Elizabeth Guilt.

Your one-hundred word story for the day is:

Day's Orders

by Elizabeth Guilt

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"Sir!"

"What's that?"

"Sir, Duty Shitehawk reporting for orders, Sir!"

"More like it. Roost easy."

"Sir."

"Today's roster: harbour wall. Principal lookout, ten till three. Keep your eyes peeled, we've had reports of Morris dancers in the area. Our intel says there should be a line of them wearing dark colours around noon. Strafe at will. 

"Three till five, surprise chip inspections. Toddlers have been underrepped recently, so try to take your samples from them.

"Final hour, unnecessary screaming. All clear?"

"Clear as sand."

"Less of your beak! For that, two early shifts: jumping up and down on roof tiles."

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My family invariably refers to seagulls as shitehawks. You're not allowed to register boats with names that might be considered offensive, but when I was little there was a boat registered in Whitby harbour called Shy Talk. It's still one of my favourite boat names.

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Take care, everyone, and I'll see you tomorrow for episode 25.

https://www.elizabethguilt.com/drabbletober/s2episode24