Today I learned about the idea of trying to honestly see things from the other person’s POV. I was blessed with coming across this idea from reading How to Win Friends and Influence People. Trying honestly to see things from the other person point of view has three components in my opinion. It means to take my personal feelings and biases out of the equation. It means to look for the positive intent from the other person. It also means to estimate their wants/needs and their most likely response to my actions. This is something I rarely did. I was 100% sold on the idea of don’t care what people think. This caused me to not put in much effort into understanding why I wasn’t getting along with people. Allowing myself to not even try to understand people have me the freedom of living in my own world. I was free. At least that’s what I thought. I was the king of an empty castle. With this idea if honestly trying to see things from the other person’s POV I’ve found that there are three benefits. The benefits being: one breaks out of the default self-centered mindset. One develops more of an understanding of the other person. Also, in putting this idea in practice the likelihood to get along better with others increases. Being self-centered is the default. I’ve found that in myself and in the majority. It just makes sense why this would be the case. One’s self is their most significant possession. One’s individuality means more to them than most other things. Being self-centered has its drawbacks though. The most debilitating is that it puts a cap on learning. Those who are more interested in themselves than the world around them won’t set out to seek more understanding on the exterior. The same for intrapersonal relationships. When one is more interested in themselves than the other person both parties known. Resentment accrues the more and more conversations are lopsided. Eventually the other person is going to get fed up. This idea when put into practice will help me get along with others. Seeing things from their POV will allow me to make the best decision in response to their actions. The negatives of this idea are that one might discover a painful truth, one might discover their own selfishness and inconsistencies, and lastly that it is more difficult and requires thoughtfulness to put one’s self in the other person’s shoes. Finding a painful truth can take its toll. Finding a painful truth removes the peaceful bliss of ignorance. But finding a painful truth is sobering and allows one to make the best decision. In trying to see from the other person’s POV one might find fault in their own identify. One might discover there own shortcomings. This is good in my opinion because upon discovering them they can be corrected. Taking that extra step to see things from another person’s POV requires extra time and extra energy. It can be difficult to expend these assets after a long day. But in my opinion it’s so worth it. Both parties benefit. An interesting thing about this idea is that it allows one to see past people bullshit. I’m taking the extra step to see things from the other person’s POV you realize when people are lying more than if you hadn’t. You realize when people are trying to get over on you. You recognize when people act out because they don’t feel comfortable with themselves. That is something will save a person a lifetime of anguish.