“Self-confidence starts when you decide ‘I am going to start to create a relationship with myself’.”

–Candy Motzek

Self-confidence. We need to step into it as women. I lead off my conversation with Candy Motzek coach of coaches with discussion of self-confidence. Confidence is actually two things — an emotion that ebbs and flows and something deeper inside, a more core piece of us, inner-confidence. That’s what Candy had to repair. Maybe your self-confidence has taken a hit too.

Does this sound familiar? You did all the things you were supposed to do: good grades, gold stars, taking care of spouse and kids, putting everyone else first. But you find yourself asking, What about me? or Who am I?, it’s time to re-awaken your self-confidence.

And it can be transformative. Candy shares the story of a client who went from despairing, not knowing what to do to vibrant and on fire in three months. What changed? She found herself. She respected herself. She took care of herself. Her self-confidence was back. The first and most important step? Decide that you are going to start a relationship with yourself.

We talk about: 

• Choosing to start a relationship with yourself. The work may take time, but that decision can happen in an instant.
• Journaling as a tool for self-discovery. Think of it as a coffee date with yourself. We share some simple prompts to get you past the blank page.
• Using journaling to clear out your head, like you’d clear out a junk drawer, and expressing a full range of emotions. Journaling out the crap is required!
• The compounding effect of the life you are building for yourself.
• Embracing your inner critic and recognizing it as the voice of evolution
• What self-confidence actually looks like and finding your own moments of courage

ABOUT CANDY

Candy Motzek is an author, podcast host, and business coach for life coaches. Candy helps smart people start successful coaching businesses. She believes that coaching transforms lives and that being a coach is a calling. She helps her clients get unstuck & feel more confidence and clarity so they can play bigger, sign clients & create more meaningful success. She is a 'recovering' corporate executive & engineer who combines practical strategy & mindset in her calming unique approach.

LINKS

• Podcast: She Coaches
• Free gift: candysfreegift.com
• Website: stepintosuccessnow.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/candymotzek/
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/candy-motzek/

DOABLE CHANGES

At the end of every episode, we share three doable changes, so you can take what you've heard and put it into action. Change comes from action. 

Doable changes are things that you can add into your life, one at a time to make micro shifts and really create a ripple effect that will create a big change over time. Choose one that really piques your interest and roll with it. 

Here are three Doable Changes from this conversation:

• CHOOSE A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOURSELF. This is the very first step to building your self-confidence, and it’s the most important. If you do one doable change start with this one.
• JOURNALING. Journaling is a great way to explore yourself—what you like, fear, want in your life. We recommend handwriting in your journal, but you could keep something electronically. To get started, try one of these questions: What am I thinking about today? What am I worried about? What do I want in my life? Think of it as a coffee date with yourself.
• WORK WITH YOUR INNER CRITiC. Don’t let your inner critic sink your self-confidence. That doesn’t mean resisting or fighting your inner critic, it means recognizing that your inner critic is there, trying to keep you safe. You can listen, acknowledge fears, and move on. Next time your inner critic gets loud, remind yourself that your inner critic is the voice of evolution.