In this episode (027), I speak to Dr. Karen Carpenter, Clinical Sexologist/Psychologist, about many things around sex and relationships using questions from you our loyal listeners.  We cover everything from open relationships to erectile dysfunction to sexual fluidity to relationship age gaps.  This conversation is quite exciting and informative. 

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In this episode we covered the following:

• Introduction - Who is Dr. Karen Carpenter and what do you do?
• How did you end up pursuing sexology and why?
• Are there any other Clinical Sexologists in Jamaica right now?
• Has becoming a clinical sexologist taken away from your other psychology practices?
• Questions from the listeners:
  • Erectile Dysfunction (ED) - First-time/early sexual encounters, middle-aged with new changes and men with chronic illnesses.
  • Isn’t the anxiety in ED compounded by the woman’s concerns?
  • Are some middle-aged men still hitting it like when they were 21-years-old?
  • What age gap is appropriate for a couple?
  • What is the reason for the suggested appropriate age gap for a couple?
  • Can you masturbate too much?
  • Define Open Relationships? Polyamory, Swingers etc.
  • Do you believe there is more safety in a polyamorous situation than some of our more conventional relationship structures?
  • Are the polyamory rules different for same-sex couples?
  • Sexual Fluidity, what’s your take on it? Do you believe there is a spectrum and that people fall in different places on the spectrum?
    • NB: ‘Love on a continuum’ - Karen Carpenter and Matthew McKenzie (Article by one of her students researching the sexual spectrum of homosexuals on a continuum. This was a follow up to a similar paper Karen had done on lesbians in Jamaica.)
  • Introduction of new things into the relationship:
    • Exploring a new pleasure zone on the body and how a therapist could help.
    • What if this sexual exploration actually unearths some pathology or underlying pathology?
  • How do you feel about dating in Jamaica or in a small space?
  • Do you believe there is any link to astrology in attraction?
    In a new relationship, to share or not to share?
    • Information about exes
    • Information about treated sexually transmitted infections
    • Information about a chronic illness
  • Love Languages
• Tips to stay healthy in relationships and sexually.
• Any new things on the horizon for you?

Find many cool things Karen here:

Email: [email protected]

Facebook Page for her show, ‘Love and Sex’: https://www.facebook.com/LoveandSexJamaica/

Book: ‘Love & Sex: The Basics’ by Dr. Karen Carpenter 

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Music for Podcast: Reggae Meets Soul (Outro) - Mario Evon.

Photo in Podcast Artwork by Tiffany Lue-Yen.

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NOTABLE QUOTES:

• “Sex is at the centre of everything.” - Dr. Karen Carpenter
• “Sex turns the world.” - Dr. Karen Carpenter
• “Wetness is not a sign of horniness.” - Dr. Karen Carpenter
• ME: So you don’t actually think women get more wet if they are more turned on? Karen: “I think women who get wet more...get wet more.”
• “If you look at the sex in a relationship, it is like a thermometer. It tells you exactly what is going on in the relationship.” - Dr. Karen Carpenter
• “I am a huge advocate for condom use.” - Dr. Karen Carpenter
• “I think we are born omnisexual.” - Dr. Karen Carpenter
• “Sexual attraction has nothing to do with reproductive capacity.” - Dr. Karen Carpenter
• “I use the term sex aids because toys are for kids.” - Dr. Karen Carpenter
• “Although we think our partners are here to stay, they are here for the day.” - Dr. Karen Carpenter
• “You know a platonic friend.  The minute you enter into a r...