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 Brené Brown describes shame as follows:

"It is the intense feeling that washes over us and makes us feel so flawed that we question whether we are worthy of love, belonging and connection."

In my opinion, that is one of the worst, if not THE worst, feelings any human being can ever feel. We're social creatures, we're meant to bond and connect with others, not live a solitary life in isolation.

Our societies were built on coming together and helping each other out and working together. When you make someone feel like they are unworthy and not good enough, to our primitive minds that can feel like death, or a precursor to death.

Getting kicked out of the group, whether physically or mentally/emotionally, can feel like a death sentence. That is what it feels like to our bodies when we feel shame. We feel like we're not good enough just as we are and if we're not good enough to be part of the group then we're going to be alone, and if we're alone we're certainly going to die without the help and protection of the group.

This notion of "self-made" anything is bullsh*t. Even if you believe you are the most independent person in the world, at the very least your parents came together at some point in time to make your existence possible. If it weren't for them you never would've existed.

As humans, socializing and connecting is in our DNA. When we make each other feel like we're not good enough just as we are, we drive a stake straight into the heart of what it means to be a human being inhabiting this earth.

I've got good news though: you are good enough just the way you are.