There are predictable directions we head when we feel the sting of shame. If we don't share it and shed it, it moves us to cover up, hide out, blame, or justify and excuse. At the heart of shame is alienation, and it can lead up to self-harm or annihilation. If we face it and share it, it opens us to grace. Grace is the favor we do not deserve, and at the heart of grace is acceptance and affection. We cannot heal our own shame. It disconnects us from relationship and can only be healed by reaching out to God and others.