Unless this is all a fevered slip in the shower dream sequence we are uncovering one of the biggest and best themes ever: the iconic tune for Dallas.

This is episode four of our run, where, assuming we don’t get cancelled, like some of the shows we will go on to mention, we are looking at some of the best gosh darned TV themes of all time. The theme for this unmissable slice of 80s prime time TV was composed by Jerrold Immel, capturing the show's supposed essence of drama and intrigue. Immel's composition features a distinctive blend of orchestral and contemporary elements. That’s a polite way of saying it is overblown and pompous. Not unlike some of the shoulder pads on offer, eh?