In this deeply honest episode of the PC-PEP Podcast, Gabriela sits down with Wayne, a 63-year-old prostate cancer survivor who identifies as a gay man, to explore what it really means to receive “the big C” diagnosis in a world that is still profoundly heteronormative. Wayne walks us through his journey from a routine PSA check to a rapid PSA rise, biopsy, Gleason 7 diagnosis, and robotic prostatectomy—describing not only the medical events, but the psychological “dark night of the soul” that followed.
Wayne shares how he accidentally discovered PC-PEP in a tiny line at the bottom of an email—three months before surgery—and how the program became a true game changer: daily messages, pelvic floor exercises, strength training, monitoring, and, crucially, a gay men’s group where nothing is off the table. He speaks candidly about incontinence, doing Kegels three times a day, ongoing erectile dysfunction, and his decision to move forward with a penile implant—not as a luxury, but as a way to reclaim his sexuality and quality of life.

Together, Wayne and Gabriela explore why aftercare and empowerment are not “extras,” but essential parts of cancer treatment. They talk about the legacy of HIV/AIDS activism (“Silence Equals Death”), the power of speaking openly in gay men’s communities, and how evidence from PC-PEP shows that self-efficacy and patient activation can transform mental health—above and beyond urinary or sexual function alone. Wayne’s message is clear: men with prostate cancer need more than surgery and scans. They need tools, community, and a roadmap handed to them at diagnosis, not discovered by accident.

Key Messages of Inspiration and Empowerment for Men Diagnosed with Prostate Cancer:

1. A cancer diagnosis is a psychological earthquake—aftercare is not optional. Wayne describes the weeks after hearing “you have cancer” as a terrifying free fall. He reminds us that leaving men alone with Google and fear is dangerous—and that structured support like PC-PEP can be the “hand on the shoulder” after the consultation ends.

2. Silence equals death: talking openly can save your sanity and your life.
Wayne explains how speaking honestly about bodies, sex, fear, and identity is a survival skill. For gay, bi, and men who have sex with men, open conversation is not oversharing—it’s medicine.

3. Empowerment and self-efficacy change your mental health more than function alone. Wayne’s story echoes PC-PEP research showing that feeling informed, active, and in control explains much of the improvement in distress—not just better continence or erections. Small, consistent actions—like Kegels, exercise, and daily program tools—build a sense of “I’ve got this.”

4. You still deserve pleasure, intimacy, and a sex life after prostate cancer.
Wayne speaks movingly about grieving the loss of ejaculation, the shock of post-surgery erectile dysfunction, and his choice to pursue a penile implant. His message: you are not dead, not broken, and not selfish for wanting an active sex life at any age. Seeking solutions is an act of self-respect, not vanity.

5. Healthcare must hand you a roadmap at diagnosis—ask for it.
Wayne is clear: the urologist’s office is “where the rubber hits the road.” Men should leave with a simple sheet listing programs and trusted resources—PC-PEP, national foundations, high-quality podcasts and websites—so they don’t fall down the doom-scrolling rabbit hole alone. If you weren’t given one, ask.

6. Your story matters—and may be exactly what another man needs to hear. Wayne spent months wanting to keep his diagnosis private, then reframed that instinct as a missed opportunity to help others. His willingness to speak openly—about gay identity, grief, fear, implants, and hope—is a powerful reminder that every survivor’s voice can light the way for someone still in the dark.

🎧 Listen to the episode on Buz

EMPOWER YOURSELF!