Hey, Nurse Squad! 👋 Sam & Kelly here, fresh off At The Nurses Station – your no-patients-allowed zone for ER giggles, life hacks, and "oh god, why me?" moments. This ep? Total chaos fuel. Sam's rocking post-night-shift zombie mode (blame the 7-min wake-up 😴), Kelly's fresh-faced after acing a forensic nursing interview (detective vibes? Yes please! 🔍). We dish on pre-nurse neuroses, stair-counting drama, and high school horrors that still make us blush. Grab your scrubs (or PJs), and let's bullet-blitz this bad boy! 💉✨

Wake-Up Woes & Job Jitters: Morning Mayhem Alert! ☕😵‍💫

* Sam's survival mode: Night shift queen, but oops – hit record 7 mins after eyes open. "Rough? Understatement. Coffee IV stat!" ☕💉

* Kelly's boss babe energy: Nailed that per diem forensic gig interview. "20 years in? Take me or leave me. Hi, it's me!" (Pro tip: ER beats the nerves out of ya. 💪)

* Tea time twist: We spill on ditching control-freak eras. Kelly's ex-OCD (food-touching freakout? Gone. 🥦🚫) Sam's teen rage? Tamed by water polo & mom life. "Nursing: The ultimate chill pill... mostly." 😎

Stair Counting Showdown: OCD or Just Us? 🪜🤔

The saga lives! Last ep's bombshell: Most peeps don't count stairs. Mind. Blown. 🤯

* Sam's stance: "Eight from the garage? Still tallying. Natural brain glitch? Fight me!" (Kelly: "Ask around – you're the weirdo now. 😂")

* Kelly's glow-down: Used to obsess, but ER chaos cured it. "No brain space for nonsense. Priorities: Patients, not steps!"

* Squad callout: Do YOU count? Spill – we're collecting allies (or eye-rolls). 👇

Shift Shenanigans: Underwear Wars & Dream Teams! 👙🏆

Two nights, 16 hours of gold. Best crew ever? Check. 😍

* Team triumph: "We can handle ANYTHING – laughs included!" Epic vibes when the squad clicks.

* Control freak flashbacks: ER's the great equalizer. "ICU neurotic? Nah. Flow with the chaos or drown." 🌊

Sick Kid Spotting: Monitor Lies vs. Gut Feels! 👶📈

That gut-wrenching tale: Vomiting toddler, no IV luck, grunting but "stable" on screen? Yikes. 😱

* Scarier scenario: Good numbers, crappy patient look. "Kids crash FAST – vitals lie!" (Vs. bad vitals/good look? Still sus, but less panic.)

* Quick-scan hacks (5-sec rule):

* Color first: Pale/gray? Red flag city. 🚩

* Cap refill + chest rise: Slow refill? Trouble brewing.

* Nuance ninja: Tachycardic + tachypneic? Double trouble. "Screaming baby at 220? Meh. But add grunting? STAT!"

* Advocacy alert: Providers brush off "feels off"? Push back. "Nurses: The real MVPs." 🦸‍♀️

Rapid-Fire Realness: Colors, Critters & Cross-Gender BFFs? 🎨🐶🤝

Buckle up – we blitz the fun stuff!

* ** fave color?**: Sam: "Beige. Neutral queen – it's safe!" 🧡 Kelly: "Every shade by mood. Too much? Nah, that's me." 🌈

* Men + women friends?: Polarized AF! Kelly: "Slippery slope post-marriage. Jealous redhead vibes – what's he missing from US?" 😤 Sam: "Totally fine if married – safety net! But boundaries: No spouse tea or TMI. Electron clouds, baby!" ⚛️ (Backlash incoming? Bring it.)

* Talking animals' nicest?: Dogs, duh! "Dumb, happy loyalists. Cats? Sassy villains. Bunnies? Sneaky. Pit bulls? Pass." 🐕💕 (House cats as faves? Sam owns it.)

High School Horror Stories: Cringe Level 1000! 😳📚

Embarrassment Olympics? We win gold (and scars).

* Kelly's smash: Funeral face-plant into glass door. "Mid-rites, hay fever blowout – bloody nose + stares from the whole congregation. Hid in the foyer FOREVER." 😭 (Pro: Catholic family laughs now?)

* Sam's catastrophe: Daisy Dukes on a ropes course? Took YEARS to process the wardrobe malfunction. 👖💔 (MIL fail: No pants pep talk? Rookie move.)

* Bonus bombshell: Kelly's now-MIL's car-ride lecture: "Don't trap my son with a baby!" At 17. On a 6-hr drive. "Harassment? 100%. Wild." 🚗🚫

Outro Vibes: From Cringe to Clutch – We Made It! 🏅

Whew – we laughed, cringed, and survived (no bloody noses here). Nursing: The ultimate plot twist. What's YOUR most epic fail? Stair counter? Drop it below – we heart the chaos! 👇 Subscribe, review (thumbs up = love ❤️), and share with your squad. Next week: More nurse nonsense. Seat saved! 🪑

xoxo, Sam & Kelly At The Nurses Station Pod P.S. Not med advice – text your BFF, not your ex. 📱

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit atthenursesstation.substack.com