Meet the stakeholder: the polite ghost who appears at milestones to veto, expand scope, or ask for 'visibility.' This ten-minute forensic audit unmasks the stakeholder as a role, not a status, and shows how the label gets weaponized to diffuse responsibility. Dr Disruptor rails against the mythic stakeholder committee while The Survivor models humane tactics to protect your timeline and reputation. Listeners will get three diagnostic signals that identify whether a stakeholder is a real decision-maker or theater, a lightweight stakeholder map exercise to clarify who actually needs to sign, a triage flow to convert vague asks into named owners and deadlines, and three paste-ready scripts (gentle, neutral, assertive) for pinning decisions in meetings or Slack. Practical, satirical, and empathetic, the episode ends with a one-line email you can drop into threads to force ownership. Visit the show site to grab the 'Stakeholder Pinning' one-pager.