Great Epstein’s ghost! We are finally back from summer vacation and things are humming along in standard order around here… The world is still being run by a cabal of billionaire pedophiles, the debate over what it takes to mow down 30-50 feral hogs has died down, and any actual worldly concern is diminished by a marketing ploy to have us foaming at the mouth about whose chicken sandwich is better. Some of you seemed upset about us being gone, but trust us, you’re better off missing out on Josh’s Epstein Brained takes of the past month and a half.

So where were we? We’re here to jump back in with personal updates and questions about the state of our dating lives. Are we even capable of doing this anymore? Leyla is fresh off the boat from the jolly old rains of London an sulking in the ennui of leaving Paris. But she’s somewhat ready to tell us what the boys on Tinder are like across the pond. Also, Josh apologizes for his characterizations of British people in this episode (but not really).