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Stop Asking “What Do You Do?” The Better Question That Builds Real Connection
Most networking starts with the wrong question: “What do you do?”
In this conversation, executive coach and classically trained singer Jessica Wan breaks down why that question shuts people down, especially during layoffs, transitions, and identity shifts, and what to ask instead if you want a real connection.
We also talk about rebuilding community outside of work, why “together” is her word for 2026, and how her best work happens when the creative side and the business side actually meet.If this hit home, drop a comment with the better question you want to start using.
CONNECT WITH JESSICA
Website: https://www.jessicawan.com/About: https://www.jessicawan.com/about-jessicaLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jessicamwan/The Ampersand Manifesto: https://www.theampersandmanifesto.com/Ampersand on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5AMXZidOLLlcRSbjo57dC9Ampersand on Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-ampersand-manifesto-make-your-mark-in-multiple-fields/id1636945117
CONNECT WITH COACHFUL COACHING
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@coachfulcoaching
Spotify: https://spotify.link/NTBgVJIL3yb
Apple: https://apple.co/41Cz5gI
CHAPTERS
00:00 Intro: why “what do you do” fails
02:09 Fear-based times and what leaders are feeling
04:20 Rebuilding community after leaving a role
10:53 How to talk about uncertainty without spiraling
14:15 When your network is tied to work identity
19:32 The hidden damage of “What do you do?”
23:58 Better questions: what are you excited about?
29:00 Jessica’s word for 2026: Together
30:45 Blending art + business: the Opera Parallel story
32:55 Create space and your life fills it
36:56 Jessica’s links + The Ampersand Manifesto
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By David Fung
5
44 ratings
Most networking starts with the wrong question: “What do you do?”
In this conversation, executive coach and classically trained singer Jessica Wan breaks down why that question shuts people down, especially during layoffs, transitions, and identity shifts, and what to ask instead if you want a real connection.
We also talk about rebuilding community outside of work, why “together” is her word for 2026, and how her best work happens when the creative side and the business side actually meet.If this hit home, drop a comment with the better question you want to start using.
CONNECT WITH JESSICA
Website: https://www.jessicawan.com/About: https://www.jessicawan.com/about-jessicaLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jessicamwan/The Ampersand Manifesto: https://www.theampersandmanifesto.com/Ampersand on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5AMXZidOLLlcRSbjo57dC9Ampersand on Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-ampersand-manifesto-make-your-mark-in-multiple-fields/id1636945117
CONNECT WITH COACHFUL COACHING
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@coachfulcoaching
Spotify: https://spotify.link/NTBgVJIL3yb
Apple: https://apple.co/41Cz5gI
CHAPTERS
00:00 Intro: why “what do you do” fails
02:09 Fear-based times and what leaders are feeling
04:20 Rebuilding community after leaving a role
10:53 How to talk about uncertainty without spiraling
14:15 When your network is tied to work identity
19:32 The hidden damage of “What do you do?”
23:58 Better questions: what are you excited about?
29:00 Jessica’s word for 2026: Together
30:45 Blending art + business: the Opera Parallel story
32:55 Create space and your life fills it
36:56 Jessica’s links + The Ampersand Manifesto