Professor McGonagall stars in the reboot of “Kill Bill,” and it’s good this time. Ron somehow eats his Number 2 pencil in the middle of taking the OWLs. Harry has a fucked up dream in which Natalie Portman dies while giving birth to twins? Hagrid has an idea so smart that it almost gets two of his students murdered, twice.

Stop, Grawp, Shut ‘em Down Open Up Shop — Book 5, Ch. 30-32

Does Hogwarts accept adults? Join Josh as he reads Harry Potter for the first time with the guidance of his co-host and patronus Aaron. Discover or re-visit all seven books through the eyes of some grown nerds.

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Like a burst of red sparks from somewhere in a hedge maze, our fourth movie watch-along has appeared! Hear us react to emo Ron, Mad Eye “Too Much Business” Moody, and geek the fuck OUT over the graveyard scene. Watch-along MP3 available at newwizards.fm!

Movie Watch-Along Recap — Goblet of Fire

After a holiday break, the wizards are back with movie three! How many times will we mention “Primer?” Is Josh capable of identifying Gary Oldman? Will the werewolf be scary, or will it have more of a Deviantart kind of vibe? Hear our recap here, and check newwizards.fm for the watch-along MP3!

Movie Watch-Along Recap — Prisoner of Azkaban

We’re clipping along and getting snaked up! Listen to us go gaga for Gilderoy, consider Salazar Slytherin’s impeccable taste in home furnishings, and wonder aloud how it is that kids grow like that. Watch along with us via the MP3 at newwizards.fm!

Movie Watch-Along Recap — Chamber of Secrets

It’s the recap to our first watch-along! Tune-in to hear us gush about (and misidentify) British actors. This was a really good one! The watch-along MP3 can be had at the bottom of newwizards.fm — let us know what you think!

Movie Watch-Along Recap — Sorcerer's Stone

Wow… what a wild ride :’) We want to thank everyone for listening and reading along with us! We reflect on what magic really *is* one last time, consider the series as a whole, and most importantly, accept that Hogwarts is somewhere in the Scottish countryside. Stay tuned for the movie recaps and watch-alongs coming soon!

Stop, Grawp, Shut ‘em Down Open Up Shop — Book 5, Ch. 30-32

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