Prima Materia is often considered "the absolute beginning, pure chaos ready to transmute into order, and the divine spark within absolute darkness."

I moved in with my mom to take care of her at the beginning of COVID. I thought I’d be there for a couple of months—but nothing prepared me for what came next.

Our relationship had never been easy, and navigating the pandemic, and what would be her final days forced me to confront the unresolved, the painful, and the complicated love that defined us.

This podcast isn’t about pretending things are okay when they’re not. But it isn’t just about grief either—it’s about figuring out who you are when the roles you once held—caregiver, daughter, witness—no longer define you. It’s about the unexpected moments of joy that sneak in, the small ways we learn to heal, and the radical act of making space for yourself when the world keeps demanding more.