TW: Purity culture

In this episode, we sit down with Mary B. (she/her) who is a New York City–based speaker, author, and host of the Found Family podcast. Mary B. traces her winding spiritual journey: from small-town Episcopal and Methodist pews, through Young Life and the World Race, into the soft patriarchy of “reasonable” evangelical spaces where certainty felt safer than questions.

Together we talk about purity culture, sexual shame, and the quiet “gay panic” of Subarus, flannels, and sapphic movie scenes that slowly cracked open her understanding of herself as bi. Mary B. shares how therapy, queer friends, and a growing disconnect with non-affirming theology eventually led her to walk away from a church she’d poured years into—and toward Pride, queer Bible study, and a faith that actually makes room for her full self.

We also get into people-pleasing, spiritual authority, and the moment she realized that the men on stage are not the voice of God—they’re just dudes. This is a story about found family, sacred queer spaces, grief, and the deep relief of finally letting the “sleeping bear” of your sexuality wake up.