In this episode of Controlled Burn, Shane Davis and Brandon Fountain come in hot after a doomscroll discovery that raises the most important question nobody asked for: why is anyone “sunning” their perineum… and what does that even accomplish?

From there, the conversation spirals (respectfully) through regional slang, the realities of getting older (everything hurts, surprise), and the kind of lab-adjacent chaos you only get when the Red Bull is driving.Underneath the comedy, they still land the plane on compliance and contamination like why your lab can’t test bodily fluids under current ISO scope, how pesticide exposure can sneak into a facility through totally normal day-to-day contact, and why “we don’t use pesticides” is usually the start of an investigation, not the end.

And yes… they also reveal the most unhinged-yet-effective piece of workplace communication ever: a profane “you’re being a jerk” card that somehow became a real, functioning professional tool.

In this episode:

– The internet’s weirdest wellness trend: “perineum sunning” (yes, really)

– Why ISO scope matters (and why bodily fluid testing is a no-go)

– How pesticide contamination can happen without anyone spraying a thing

– Why micro and residue failures can come from tiny, invisible variables

– Industry updates: the EAC meeting rescheduled to February 27 + credentialing refunds