In this chaotic kickoff, I spill all about toxic shit, lesbian bed death, love bombing, and the Olympic sport we call U-Hauling. We’ll laugh about wild Tinder dates, cringe at dating site disasters, and unpack why my attachment style might be more ‘Velcro’ than ‘secure.’ No names, just nicknames (and plenty of shade). If you’ve ever gone from “Nice to meet you” to “What’s our baby’s name?” in three dates… welcome home.