Today, we tend to dismiss people who are overly concerned with what others think as being egotistical or weak or sensitive. But actually, caring what others think of us, wanting be liked by the group, was an absolutely crucial personality trait in ancient societies. Yet, this remains a difficult reality for us to swallow. Our society tends to glorify the people who stand out from the crowd, who welcome the hissing and booing of an audience, who don’t give a damn what others think. The legacy of Sturm und Drang and the Romantic hero is still very much with us today. When we go into a café and see the troubled man sitting alone in the corner, with long hair, John Lennon glasses, scribbling in his notebooks, what we are seeing is Werther’s progeny. The Torah is particularly sensitive to humans as inherently pack animals, animals that need each other, that need to be part of the group. But it’s by no means a given that every group will want to have us as a member. And yet, sometimes those societies which don’t want us are the same societies which we, perversely, so desperately wish to belong to. Theodor Herzl finally snapped out of automatized thinking to apply mindful self-compassion to his people.

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Music: Beethoven - "An die Ferne Geliebte"