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Have you ever pretended not to care when you actually did? Welcome to the puzzling world of "too cool culture" in modern dating, where emotional detachment is somehow considered a strength and vulnerability a weakness.

From personally playing the "cool girl" with an army sergeant who invalidated my feelings to dating a man in an open marriage who expected exclusivity from me (the irony!), I've learned firsthand that hiding your authentic self only leads to pain. This episode dives into why we're all so afraid to show we care, and how the fear of rejection drives us to create connections built on performance rather than truth.

Social media and trends like "hot girl summer" have conditioned us to believe that catching feelings is something to avoid, but what if vulnerability is actually the uncut gem we're all searching for? I'm challenging the notion that being emotionally unavailable is attractive, and making the case that authentic connection requires courage - the courage to send that text when you want to (not when it's "strategic"), to express genuine interest, and to have honest conversations about expectations.

Whether you're trying to figure out why your date hasn't texted back for three days or you're wondering if you should tell someone how you really feel, this episode is a reminder that in a world where everyone's afraid to care too much, those brave enough to be emotionally available are the ones building relationships with meaning. Ready to stop pretending and start connecting? Listen in, and let's get real about dating.

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xoxo Jan