On This Walk

The Act of Becoming Rather Than Achieving: Part 2

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After the valuable and intimate conversation that Robert Cumming and I shared in the last episode, we realized that our walk together was not finished. Today, he’s joining me for another episode to discuss the task of loving ourselves well, the difference between positive and negative shadows, and raising children that can balance both. 

One thing that really struck Rob in our last conversation was this idea that Rob is still on a journey to loving himself. After recording part 1, that sentiment stuck with him, and questions and thoughts began to circulate about this topic. 

Tune in to this episode to explore what it means to prioritize rest, learn about how we are approaching balance in fatherhood, and discover how you can begin showing your whole self to the world. 


In This Episode

  • (1:09) How Rob and Luke view their roles as fathers 
  • (10:23) The importance of teaching children to balance selflessness and caring for themselves 
  • (13:48) The most difficult balance that parents face 
  • (16:01) Negative shadows vs. Positive shadows 
  • (21:04) Why rest and rejuvenation are necessary pieces of life 
  • (25:19) How to understand what healthy rest looks like for you
  • (27:31) The importance of finding inner balance
  • (29:58) The realization that helped Rob shift his life
  • (33:06) Why parenting requires us to take care of ourselves first
  • (39:20) Key practices to help you find balance, love, and acceptance
  • (47:33) How Rob shows the wholeness of who he is


    • Notable Quotes

    • “As I started to look more introspectively and use that mirror to stop looking out there and start looking in here in all circumstances, what really became very clear was I had to prioritize my own, what I’d call, healing and wholing… is that recognition of that which I need to heal within myself, that which brings me back to wholeness within myself. Those were the introspections, reflections, practices that I needed to prioritize because it did fundamentally show up differently. And the way that it showed up – I have this conversation so often now with clients – I can’t say that somebody from the outside looking in may or may not see a very obvious difference in the way I’m relating at times. But now, to me, it’s not something I’m doing. It’s just something I am. It’s being in that more centered place.” – Luke (34:13) 
    • “It’s that whole idea of exclusion. We exclude so many things in our lives. And I like to think of it kind of like numbing. Like when we sit too long and our leg goes numb, what happens? You have no feeling. There’s no sensation, but love is sensation. How many things in our lives have hardened or gone numb that we’re just aren’t connected with? We’re not moving with it. So when we get up and we start moving again, what happens? Things start to flow. Things start to flow, and we get more connected and we start to have feeling again… What would actually happen if we went and started to move a bit? Cause I know for me, when my leg gets numb, it’s not a comfortable feeling to try and get it moving again. It’s actually quite uncomfortable. But doing it is important to allow me to do all the things I’m capable of doing.” – Robert (44:07)


      • Our Guest

      Robert Cumming is a leadership expert and martial artist that teaches others the art of connection, compassion, and discipline. After being bullied as a child/young adult and struggling to find healthy friendships, he found solace in the sport of taekwondo. Today, he teaches kids martial arts and coaches others on leadership and empathy in every environment.


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          On This WalkBy Luke Iorio