'Misaligned Stars—Handling Difficult Social Dances'

What do you do when the connection with your partner or the music just isn't there?

In this episode, Gui Prada and I explore the philosophy of "misaligned" dances. We discuss why faking joy is never the answer and how to use technical curiosity to save your night.

Shifting from Blame to Curiosity

When a dance feels "off," it’s easy to blame yourself, your partner, or the DJ. We suggest a different approach:

• The Investigation: Instead of thinking, "They are doing this wrong," shift to, "Interesting, why did that lead result in this movement?" This turns a frustrating dance into a technical puzzle to solve.

• Borrowing Joy: If the partner connection is weak, look at other elements. Borrow happiness from a great song or the vibe of the venue. Let the dance be one part of an overall joyful night.

Redefining the "Good Dance"

Success is often based on external factors we can't control. By shrinking your definition of a "good dance" to things you control—like your own presence—the stars align more often.

• Mental Prep: Even as pros, we face performance anxiety. We discuss the "mental prep" needed to shift from an introverted self to a grounded dancer.

• Authenticity over Politeness: Don't fake it. If the alignment isn't there, find a way to make the movement safe and comfortable, then move on.

  
  

  What is your "go-to" strategy when a dance isn't clicking? Share below!