This week on The CJ and Ted Show, CJ is still holed up in a hotel near Gatwick, battling dodgy Wi-Fi, 5G hotspots and overpriced room service, while Ted is back at home holding the fort. With Halloween in full swing, they dive into why it still feels like an imported bit of American nonsense in the UK, the awkward reality of trick-or-treating, and the rise of the over-decorated, jump-scare neighbour.

From there it’s straight into Bonfire Night and Guy Fawkes – the strange British tradition of celebrating a failed plot by burning an effigy, setting off fireworks at all hours, and traumatising pets and neighbours in the process. That then somehow turns into a full-blown food and breakfast deep dive: haggis vs black pudding, the state of hotel breakfasts, scrambled vs fried vs poached vs boiled eggs, French toast vs “eggy bread”, and the very personal politics of salt and sauces.

They also revisit stories about CJ’s American mate visiting the UK, taking on crumpets, Marmite, Cadbury chocolate, Yorkshire pudding and fish and chips for the first time – with honest (and sometimes brutal) reactions – plus reflections on just how different UK and US food culture really is.

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