Send us a text

In this episode, we dive deep into the topic that often gets avoided: sex and intimacy in long-term relationships. Whether you're in your 30s, 40s, or beyond, conversations about sex can feel like walking through a minefield. But it doesn't have to be that way. We break down why talking about sex is so hard, what’s actually happening in our bodies and minds, and most importantly, how to start the conversation in a way that brings you closer together instead of pushing you apart.

What We Discuss in This Episode:

• Why Talking About Sex Is So Difficult: Understanding the layers of rejection, body image issues, and past experiences that can make sex conversations challenging.
• The Impact of Emotional and Mental Load on Libido: How stress, burnout, and life pressures affect desire and performance, and why it's essential to address these issues together.
• What’s Really Going On in the Bedroom: Changes in our bodies and desires as we age, and how unresolved emotional tension impacts intimacy.
• How to Normalize Talking About Sex: Tips on how to approach the topic with curiosity and compassion, making it a regular part of your relationship check-ins.
• Creating Emotional Safety: Why creating a safe space to talk about intimacy is crucial and how to honor each other's needs without blame or judgment.
• Stress, Sex, and Performance: How stress messes with libido and how to start reducing that pressure to reconnect.
• Practical Steps to Improve Your Intimacy: Actionable tips to initiate the conversation and create space for vulnerability and connection.

Key Takeaways:

• Silence around sex can breed shame and distance, but starting the conversation with curiosity and compassion can rebuild intimacy.
• Emotional and mental stress often prevent us from feeling desire or performing in the bedroom. Acknowledge these pressures, and work together to ease the burden.
• Talking about sex doesn’t have to be awkward—it can become a natural part of your relationship rhythm if approached with care and openness.
• Vulnerability is key in these conversations. If you’re feeling disconnected, sharing your emotions and needs can create space for deeper intimacy.

Next Steps:

• Journal Prompt Homework: Reflect on your own feelings around intimacy and your needs, then share your thoughts with your partner. This simple exercise can reset the emotional tone between you and your partner, paving the way for more open communication moving forward.

Final Invitation: If you’ve been struggling to have these conversations with your partner, or if you feel like you’ve hit a wall, don’t do it alone. Book a free Relationship Game Plan Call with me—let’s create a safe space to talk about your intimacy and get back on track toward rebuilding the connection you both desire.

Relationship Game Plan Call

Free Conversation Starter Cards for Couples

Couples Goal Setting Workbook

Submit a Dear Katie episode question

Follow Katie Rössler on Instagram