Over time, many couples find themselves in a familiar pursue/withdrawal relationship. One partner may feel like they are doing everything in the relationship only at the expense of getting their own validation or needs met. Still, their partner often becomes more distant when they express their frustration. But there is also a fear that if the partner stops reminding their spouse that they aren't getting their needs met, they will NEVER be satisfied. So goes the all-too-familiar dance of the anxious/avoidant attached couple. Tony shares his experiences as a couples therapist on how these couples arrive on his couch, and more importantly, what to do to get the relationship to a more mature, healthy state. 

Tony references the article "Attachment Woes Between Anxious and Avoidant Partners" by Darlene Lancer, JD, LMFT from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/toxic-relationships/202008/attachment-woes-between-anxious-and-avoidant-partners

With the continuing "sheltering" rules spreading across the country, PLEASE do not think you can't continue or begin therapy now. http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch can put you quickly in touch with licensed mental health professionals who can meet through text, email, or videoconference often as soon as 24-48 hours. And if you use the link http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch, you will receive 10% off your first month of services. Please make your mental health a priority, http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch offers affordable counseling, and they even have sliding scale options if your budget is tight.

You can learn more about Tony's pornography recovery program, The Path Back, by visiting http://pathbackrecovery.com And visit http://tonyoverbay.com and sign up to receive updates on upcoming programs and podcasts.

Tony mentioned a product that he used to take out all of the "uh's" and "um's" that, in his words, "must be created by wizards and magic!" because it's that good! To learn more about Descript, click here https://descript.com?lmref=bSWcEQ

-------------------------------------------------TRANSCRIPT-----------------------------------------------

Speaker1: [00:00:01] Hey, everybody. Welcome to episode three

Speaker2: [00:00:02] Hundred and three, the virtual couch, I'm your host, Tony Overbay. I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist. Certified mine will have a coach, writer, speaker, husband, father of four and host of another podcast called Waking Up the Narcissism, which is continuing to blow my mind with the amount of subscribers and feedback, that sort of thing. So if you haven't checked that podcast out, please go give that a try. And also, the path back, the path back pornography recovery program is continuing to change the live of many people. So there's a weekly group call.

Speaker2: [00:00:28] You can go to Pathbackrecovery.com download a short e-book that describes five myths that people have about making pornography

Speaker1: [00:00:36] A coping mechanism no longer

Speaker2: [00:00:37] Once and for all. That sentence made little to no sense, but just go to Pathbackrecovery.com and there you can take a look at this e-book and to see the

Speaker1: [00:00:45] Work that is being done there, it's a very strength

Speaker2: [00:00:47] Based hold the shame, become the person you always wanted to be programed. So again, that's pathbackrecovery.com and

Speaker1: [00:00:53] I wanted to start with a completely unresolved

Speaker2: [00:00:57] Unresolved. That is also something that will probably go out in the editing. But I have to tell you, editing the audio

Speaker1: [00:01:04] Is really

Speaker2: [00:01:04] Easy because I use this product called the script and I always throw something in. The show notes that says, Hey, if you want to check out the script, go take a look at this. So if you happen to be a podcaster or anyone that does a lot of recording, go find that you can edit out all of the US and the ums and how much I repeat...