If you’ve ever left a first date feeling deflated, disappointed, or questioning if you’ll ever meet someone, this is for you. 

I dive into the exact things I tell myself after a disastrous first date: the reminders, re-frames, and confidence resets that stop me from spiralling into “I’m unlovable” territory. Dating is full of highs and lows, and one bad date doesn’t define your worth. 

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I share how I shift my mindset, process the frustration, and move forward with confidence (or take a break when I need to). Plus, I give some practical steps to help you reset and get back into a healthy dating headspace.

Whether your last date left you feeling flat, frustrated, or ready to delete the apps altogether, this episode will help you bounce back stronger.

Tune in now to hear:

1. How I feel after a bad first date

2. What actually counts as a “bad” first date

3. Don't take a bad first date personally (you're not unlovable)

4. How to stop a bad date from making you spiral

5. Can this bad date teach me anything?

6. A bad date is just a bad date

7. Practical confidence resets after a disappointing date

8. Why it’s okay to take a break from dating

9. Happy Hour: I know I said I wouldn't try this but...

10. My dating update: Am I finally back on the apps?!

11. Your dating dilemma: “I went on a bad first date and now he’s asked me for a second - I feel guilty saying no, what should I do?”

🎥 Watch the episode on YouTube

Mentioned:

Important Things I Tell Myself Before A First Date

The ‘Near-Perfect’ Date That Became An Hilarious Nightmare

He Asked Me To Send Photos And Lied About His Age

This Is The Energy You Need To Take With You On A First Date

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Support The Date with Confidence Podcast

If you'd like to show your support for the podcast, you can do so in these ways:

1) Share the podcast with your friends

2) Leave me a review on iTunes stating what you love most about the podcast so more people can find it

3) Buy me a coffee to express your gratitude for the episodes if you found them helpful, inspiring or entertaining

Visit The Date with Confidence website here. Follow your host Rebecca Hawkes on Instagram.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Be honest—have you ever planned your wedding with someone you haven’t even met yet? 

And then felt totally let down when they rocked up in a tracksuit and picked their nose through dinner?

(Yeah… I’ve been there too.)

After a 4-year dating break, I made a huge mistake: I over-romanticised first dates before they even happened. I’d build a whole fantasy based on a few messages, imagining instant chemistry and fairy-tale moments… only to feel disappointed when reality didn’t match the story in my head.

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I share why this mindset is unfair to both you and your date, and how shifting your energy, expectations, and self-talk can make first dates more fun, pressure-free, and genuinely enjoyable.

I also answer a listener’s dating dilemma on how to look and feel confident for a first date (even when you’re not feeling it inside). From go-to outfits to pre-date mindset hacks, you’ll walk away with simple, practical tips you can use straight away.

Tune in now to hear:

1. The biggest dating mistake I made after a 4-year break

2. Why over-romanticising first dates sets you up for disappointment

3. How to bring “open energy” instead of pressure to your dates

4. Simple mindset shifts to leave past bad dates behind

5. Dating dilemma: “I’m a single mum who’s just started dating, how can I look and feel confident even when I don’t feel it inside?”

6. The “first date outfit” test that works every time

7. Quick pre-date hacks: playlists, self-talk, and confidence boosts

🎥 Watch the episode on YouTube

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Support The Date with Confidence Podcast

If you'd like to show your support for the podcast, you can do so in these ways:

1) Share the podcast with your friends

2) Leave me a review on iTunes stating what you love most about the podcast so more people can find it

3) Buy me a coffee to express your gratitude for the episodes if you found them helpful, inspiring or entertaining

Visit The Date with Confidence website here. Follow your host Rebecca Hawkes on Instagram.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Be honest, are you holding yourself to the same dating standards you expect from others? 

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I share a big shift I’ve made in my dating mindset—one that’s honestly changed everything. We always talk about what we want from someone else: effort, communication, chemistry, connection. But are you showing up in the same way you want them to? I’m diving deep into the dating standards you hold for yourself.

Because you can't control how someone else shows up, but you can choose the energy, effort, and self-respect you bring to the table.

Plus: I share examples of the standards I hold myself to, habits I’ve worked on, and why holding yourself to high standards makes it so much easier to walk away from people who aren’t a match. 

I also share some Happy Hour excitement (spoiler: it involves a spicy margarita) and talk about the difference between compromise and self-abandonment in dating.

If you’ve ever ghosted yourself, ignored your boundaries, or let chemistry override red flags—this one’s for you.

Tune in now to hear:

1. What dating standards for yourself actually look like

2. How to tell when you’re not holding your own standards

3. Why "the vibe" might be clouding your judgment

4. Journal prompts to set realistic, self-respecting dating rules

5. Why holding standards for you makes it easier to walk away

6. Why I end things quickly when there’s no connection

7. How I show up physically, emotionally, and energetically for dating

8. The unattractiveness of self-abandonment disguised as “being nice”

9. Dating dilemma: “How do I hold standards without giving in to fear of missing out?”

Mentioned:

The Truth: You’re Actually Obsessed With Yourself, Not Him

How to Overcome Anxious Attachment When Dating Someone New

Your Dating Profile: How To Write One, When To Update It, What Not To Include

🎥 Watch the episode on YouTube

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here (leave me a voice note!!)

Support The Date with Confidence Podcast

If you'd like to show your support for the podcast, you can do so in these ways:

1) Share the podcast with your friends

2) Leave me a review on iTunes stating what you love most about the podcast so more people can find it

3) Buy me a coffee to express your gratitude for the episodes if you found them helpful, inspiring or entertaining

Visit The Date with Confidence website here. Follow your host Rebecca Hawkes on Instagram.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ever wondered what ChatGPT really thinks about your love life? 

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I asked ChatGPT to be brutally honest with me about my romantic blind spots… and she did not hold back. Using a juicy prompt inspired by Gala Darling, I got an AI-powered reality check on what might still be holding me back from the fairytale romance I know I deserve – and whew, it was a mix of eye-opening, confronting, and actually kind of empowering.

From over-functioning to falling for potential, I reflect on each truth, share how they show up in my real dating life, and explore what I’m doing to shift those patterns. I also spill the beans on what I’m updating in my dating profile, why I’ve taken a mini break from the apps, and whether or not I’d ever date a man’s brother. Yep, we go there.

Tune in for all the goss on:

1. The 4 dating blind spots holding me back (and probably you too)

2. Why I still fall for potential, not consistency

3. How my independence can actually block emotional intimacy

4. What “letting a man earn your vulnerability” actually means

5. The “cool girl” trap and second-guessing my own standards

6. Romanticising mystery and mistaking it for real connection

7. Happy Hour: Hinge cringe, my dating life update and a summer mocktail

8. Why I’m rethinking my dating profile prompts (again)

9. Should you ever date your ex’s brother?

The ChatGPT prompt from Gala Darling’s email: “Based on what I've told you about my dating life, tell me what my blind spots are in romance. If I want XYZ, what could I do differently to get that result? Be brutally honest!”

And I edited it to say:

“Based on what I've told you about my dating life (and what you've learned from The Date with Confidence Podcast transcripts), tell me what my blind spots are in romance. If I want the man that meets my standards and a fairytale romance, what could I do differently to get that result? Be brutally honest!”

Mentioned:

Gala Darling

How to Use ChatGPT to NEVER Settle in a Relationship

Using ChatGPT to write my future story

ChatGPT made my 5 year plan

🎥 Watch the episode on YouTube

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here.

Support The Date with Confidence Podcast

1) Share the podcast with your friends

2) Leave me a review on iTunes

3) Buy me a coffee to express your gratitude for the episodes if you found them helpful, inspiring or entertaining

Visit The Date with Confidence website here. Follow your host on Instagram.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ever felt like you’ve moved on from a past relationship… but something still lingers?

Maybe it’s the memory of an ex, the grip of a rebound that’s not quite right, or the way your body tenses when someone new gets too close. 

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I’m being honest about what it actually takes to clear the emotional baggage of past relationships so you can finally feel free and I open up about my own healing journey - working with my energy healer, facing uncomfortable truths, and using tools like EFT, breathwork, and unsent letters to truly let go.

If you’ve ever wondered why someone lives rent-free in your head—or why intimacy feels off even when it “should” feel right, this episode is for you.

Here’s what we cover:

1. Signs you’re still holding onto your ex’s energy 

2. How past relationships affect your present dating reactions

3. Why letting go frees you from toxic loops and comparison

4. 6 powerful methods for releasing old relationship energy

5. Working with a professional energy healer for trauma and energy clearing 

6. Breathwork’s powerful role in emotional release

7. Understanding toxic relationship dynamics and their energetic impact 

8. You’re either gonna get it, or think I’m bat shit crazy…

9. Listener dating dilemma: mixed signals and limited time

10. Setting your standards and knowing when to walk away

Mentioned:

Marie Houlden: Mindset Coach & Energy Healer

The Breath Channel* (affiliate link)

How to Break Up with Someone in the Kindest Way

How to Quit Dating Someone You’re Just Not Into

🎥 Watch the episode on YouTube

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Support The Date with Confidence Podcast

If you'd like to show your support for the podcast, you can do so in these ways:

1) Share the podcast with your friends

2) Leave me a review on iTunes stating what you love most about the podcast so more people can find it

3) Buy me a coffee to express your gratitude for the episodes if you found them helpful, inspiring or entertaining

Visit The Date with Confidence website here. Follow your host Rebecca Hawkes on Instagram.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

FYI: If you’re listening to this anywhere that isn’t YouTube, you may wanna skip between 19.45-24.30 as I’m updating my dating profile and if you can’t see it, it’s not that interesting…

In this juicy, slightly chaotic (but super helpful, I think) episode of The Date with Confidence podcast, I walk you through exactly how to write — or rewrite — your dating profile with confidence and clarity. We're talking prompts to avoid, what to actually include, and how to get into the best headspace before you even open the app. 

I even screen-record myself updating my Hinge profile so you can see it in action (gulp). Vulnerable? Yes. Empowering? Also yes. If your profile needs a glow-up or you're just getting back into dating, this is for you.

During Happy Hour we also get into the Hinge Cringe of the week, Swipe Right Spotlight (am i even gonna keep this segment?!) and a Dating Dilemma that had me shouting: WASH YOUR FUCKING HANDS, PLEASE. 

Tune in now to hear:

1. Why mindset is key before updating your profile

2. The two lists you have to have before writing your profile (and dating in general)

3. Prompts that give manipulators a script to use against you

4. When to update your profile (and what not to include)

5. Why passive-aggressive profiles won’t be getting you a decent date anytime soon

6. Changes I’m making to my own dating profile (watch as I tweak on YouTube)

7. A Dating Dilemma that reminded me of dating a guy I’d rather forget existed

Mentioned:

Attract on the Apps

Women on Dating Apps: Do NOT Use These Prompts

The Reason I Stopped Looking at Their Social Media

🎥 Watch the episode on YouTube

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Support The Date with Confidence Podcast

If you'd like to show your support for the podcast, you can do so in these ways:

1) Share the podcast with your friends

2) Leave me a review on iTunes stating what you love most about the podcast so more people can find it

3) Buy me a coffee to express your gratitude for the episodes if you found them helpful, inspiring or entertaining

Visit The Date with Confidence website here. Follow your host Rebecca Hawkes on Instagram.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

He didn’t make the bed so I ended it (but there’s more to this story….).

What started as a promising connection took a turn on date seven, when the effort (or lack of it) just didn’t match up. It took around 3 seconds for me to be fully checked out and this time I ended things immediately. That’s growth for ya…

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I’m sharing how to stop dating someone when you know it’s just not it, even if they’re “nice.” I talk about the guilt that can creep in when someone seems great on paper, the fear of letting a good one go, and why it’s actually kinder to end it sooner rather than later. 

Plus, I’m introducing a fresh new format to the podcast (exciting!) — with updates from my own dating life, your dilemmas, and juicy mindset shifts to help you date with confidence.

The vibe of this episode:

1. Why it's okay to walk away from someone even if nothing’s “wrong”

2. The shame we feel when we ignore our gut and stay too long

3. How to end things kindly without overexplaining or apologising

4. Why texting is totally acceptable in early dating breakups

5.  The exact message I sent when I realised he wasn’t the one

6. The realisations that came flooding within minutes of me getting the ick

7. What I’m doing next as I start dating again

If you’ve ever wondered whether you're being “too picky” or you’ve struggled to end things without overexplaining, this is the pep talk you need.

Mentioned:

Blindsided By Red Flags After Healing? How to Remove the Shame

Your Dream Relationship Exists: Here’s How to Believe In It

We Know My Opinion On Shorts…

Manifest The One

🎥 Watch the episode on YouTube

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Support The Date with Confidence Podcast

If you'd like to show your support for the podcast, you can do so in these ways:

1) Share the podcast with your friends

2) Leave me a review on iTunes stating what you love most about the podcast so more people can find it

3) Buy me a coffee to express your gratitude for the episodes if you found them helpful, inspiring or entertaining

Visit The Date with Confidence website here. Follow your host Rebecca Hawkes on Instagram.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If you’ve ever thought: 

“I used to feel hopeful about dating, but now all I hear is horror stories.” 

“Everyone around me says men are trash, and part of me is starting to believe it.”

“There’s no such thing as a fairytale anymore, online dating is just full of ghosters, love bombers and men who only want sex”

…this is for you. 

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I’m calling out the negative dating narratives that aren’t yours to buy into. If you’ve ever found yourself absorbing horror stories from friends, group chats, or reels and wondering if love is even worth it anymore, this episode is your pep talk to believe in better. 

I dive into how our mindset, beliefs, and standards shape our dating experiences—and how you don’t have to settle just because others did. I also share a personal dating story that reminded me firsthand that good men do exist, and explain why holding your standards is a powerful act of self-respect, not pickiness.

Here's the general vibe of the episode:

1. Letting Go of Fear-Based Dating Narratives: Why other people’s bad experiences don’t define your future

2. Reclaiming Hope in Dating: Shifting back into trust and belief that love is possible

3. The Power of Standards: Why you don’t need to lower the bar to find connection

4. Dating From an Empowered Place: Honouring your intuition and knowing when to walk away, even from someone who’s “good”

5. Loving Your Single Life: Why being single doesn’t mean you're behind—and how it actually supports high-standard dating

Mentioned:

Manifest The One

Confident AF: The Membership

Blindsided By Red Flags After Healing? How to Remove the Shame

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Support The Date with Confidence Podcast

If you'd like to show your support for the podcast, you can do so in these ways:

1) Share the podcast with your friends

2) Leave me a review on iTunes stating what you love most about the podcast so more people can find it

3) Buy me a coffee to express your gratitude for the episodes if you found them helpful, inspiring or entertaining

Visit The Date with Confidence website here. Follow your host Rebecca Hawkes on Instagram.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If you’ve ever thought, “How did I miss that?” “I should’ve known better” “I can’t believe I didn’t recognise that sooner” or “After everything I’ve worked on… how the fuck did I fall for this?” this is the episode for you.

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I’m diving into something I don’t think we talk about enough: the shame that creeps in when you get blindsided by red flags, even after your healing era. You’ve done the work. You’ve been to therapy. You’ve raised your standards. So how tf did you still fall for someone who wasn’t good for you? 

I’ve been there, and I know how disheartening it feels when you realise you ignored signs you swore you’d never overlook again. Listen now for your permission slip to forgive yourself, stop spiralling, and shift back into your confident, take-no-shit energy.

Here’s a sneak peek into what we discuss:

1. The shame spiral after ignoring red flags, even post-healing

2. Why subtle red flags are often the most damaging

3. How to stop blaming yourself and rewrite your narrative

4. The simple 4-step “Switch Your Story” process to release shame

5. Why they don’t deserve access to you (including your social media)

6. How to affirm your way back into an empowered mindset

7. Revisiting your standards, even if you’re not looking for “The One”

Mentioned:

Confident AF: The Membership

The Confidence Course

Am I Actually Delusional?! The Rollercoaster of Modern Dating

Burned Haystack Dating Method Facebook Group

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Support The Date with Confidence Podcast

If you'd like to show your support for the podcast, you can do so in these ways:

1) Share the podcast with your friends

2) Leave me a review on iTunes stating what you love most about the podcast so more people can find it

3) Buy me a coffee to express your gratitude for the episodes if you found them helpful, inspiring or entertaining

Visit The Date with Confidence website here. Follow your host Rebecca Hawkes on Instagram.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I open up about the grief, healing, and realisations that shaped my decision to return to dating after a tough year. 

After losing two grandparents within weeks of each other and navigating the fallout of a painful dating experience, I took a long, conscious break. Now, I'm back—dating with intention, clarity, and a renewed sense of what I truly want. 

If you’re wondering whether it’s time to get back out there, I’m sharing the signs, mindset shifts, and standards that helped me know I was ready.

Here’s what we discuss:

1. Dating After Grief: How loss and healing shifted my priorities and energy around dating

2. Conscious Dating vs. Dating From Habit: The difference between dating with intention and dating out of boredom or distraction

3. Signs You’re Ready to Date Again: What to look for emotionally and mentally before putting yourself out there

4. Dating With Standards: Why I no longer believe in giving people “chances” or ignoring red flags

5. Using Dating App Discernment: The new approach I take to swiping and filtering matches

6. Burned Haystack Dating Method: How learning about rhetorical patterns helped me decode dating profiles more effectively

7. Navigating Anxious vs. Avoidant Patterns: Recognising old wounds and shifting into secure dating energy.

Improving your dating life with The Standard Is You

The Standard Is You is a 12-week coaching programme to help you stop feeling behind, raise your standards, and become the love of your life in your 30s. This group programme is for the 30-something who’s done with settling — in dating, in career, in friendships, in everything.

If you're done with dating Chads who ask for photos before you've met, ghost you after a week, put in zero effort to actually get to know you and think that inviting you to dinner at their place is an appropriate first date, this is for you.

Mentioned:

How to Overcome Anxious Attachment When Dating Someone New

Burned Haystack Dating Method Facebook Group

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Support The Date with Confidence Podcast

If you'd like to show your support for the podcast, you can do so in these ways:

1) Share the podcast with your friends

2) Leave me a review on iTunes stating what you love most about the podcast so more people can find it

3) Buy me a coffee to express your gratitude for the episodes if you found them helpful, inspiring or entertaining

Visit The Date with Confidence website here. Follow Rebecca on Instagram.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.