I'm staring at another TEDx speaker application in my inbox. The subject line promises "A Revolutionary Idea That Will Change Everything." The email begins with "Dear TEDx Organizer" and proceeds to three paragraphs outlining how their groundbreaking concept will transform humanity.

There's just one problem.

They never looked at our website. Because if they had, they would have seen those four words right on the front page: "Do not send unsolicited applications."

We have a process. We have themes. We have specific focuses for each event. But they didn't bother to check any of that.

And I'm sitting there thinking - this isn't really about TEDx applications, is it?’

The Exhale-Only Epidemic

I'm hearing the same story everywhere. HR departments are drowning in resumes that look perfect but have nothing to do with the actual job. Sales professionals are getting LinkedIn messages from "experts" who clearly spent zero time understanding their business. Grant applications that miss entirely the foundation's focus areas.

Everyone's blaming AI. "People are getting lazy," they say. "These tools are making communication worse."

But here's what I think is really happening: AI didn't break communication. It just exposed that we were never really communicating in the first place.

How AI Revealed the Truth

Here's exactly how this exposure happened:

Before AI, when people sent generic, self-focused messages, it still took real time and effort. Even a bad cover letter required someone to sit down, think about what to write, and actually type it out. The volume was naturally limited by human effort.

Now someone can take a job posting, paste it into ChatGPT, and generate fifty "perfect" applications in an hour. The same selfish approach - "what do I want to say?" - but now on a massive scale.

AI didn't create this problem. It made thoughtless communication cheap and easy on an industrial scale.

The pattern became impossible to ignore. When HR departments suddenly get 500 applications instead of 10, and they're all using similar AI-generated phrasing, you realize how little actual thought went into each one.

And here's the kicker - the few people who actually took time to understand the role and the company suddenly stand out like spotlights in a dark field.

We were always this selfish in our communication. We couldn't afford to be this lazy about it before.

A friend of mine calls it "exhale-only" communication. We're so focused on what we want to say, what we need, what's in it for us, that we don't stop for even a millisecond to understand what the other person actually needs.

AI just made it easier to do what we were already doing - talking at people instead of with people.

The Efficiency Delusion

Here's what really gets me about this whole situation: we've convinced ourselves that sending a hundred bad messages is better than sending five good ones. We call it "efficiency."

That's not efficiency. That's delusion.

While You're Looking for Shortcuts, Others Are Winning

You know what's happening while everyone's searching for the perfect AI prompt to generate their outreach?

The people who actually get the jobs, land the speaking opportunities, and close the deals - they're still doing the work. They're reading the websites. Understanding the companies. Crafting messages that actually connect to what people need.

While everyone else is hitting "generate" and "send," these people are thinking. And guess what? They're winning.

The Framework That Changes Everything

About twenty years ago, a guy named Andy Blum taught me a five-point communication framework that I still use today. It's simple, but it forces you to flip your entire approach:

* What is the goal of your communication?

* What's your strategy?

* What's in it for your audience?

* What's required of your audience?

* What happens next?

Let me show you how this works in practice.

Say you want to speak at a TEDx event:

Your goal? Get the organizer actually to consider your application.

Your strategy? Instead of another email they'll ignore, send a 90-second video.

What's in it for them? They get something different. Something that won't end up in their "read later" pile that never gets read.

What's required of them? Just watch. That's it.

What's next? They might actually reach out and say, "Hey, let's talk."

The Story Solution

But here's the second part that makes this really powerful: Start with a story.

Not a pitch. Not a list of your accomplishments. A story.

For that TEDx application? Tell them about the moment your big idea hit you. The challenge that led to your breakthrough. The personal experience that connects to their event's theme.

For a job application? Tell them about seeing their posting and thinking, "I've been preparing for this role my entire career." Share the story of why their company's mission matters to you personally.

Make it human. Make it real. Make it about connection, not just credentials.

Why This Works (And Why Everyone Else Is Still Losing)

We're living in a video-first world now. TikTok, Instagram Stories, YouTube - we're trained to engage with narrative content that grabs us immediately.

However, most professional communication remains stuck in 1995. Same boring cover letters. Same generic pitches. Same spray-and-pray mentality.

The first to figure this out will win. Not because they're gaming the system, but because they're actually communicating again.

Stop Making Excuses

If you're sitting there thinking, "But everyone's using AI for outreach now,” stop right there.

"Everyone's doing it" isn't a strategy. It's an excuse.

The opportunity isn't in doing what everyone else is doing faster. The opportunity is in doing what everyone else stopped doing - actually paying attention.

The Uncomfortable Truth About Modern Communication

Here's what really gets me. We have access to numerous incredible tools, including AI, video, and global connectivity. And instead of using them to understand each other better, we're using them to broadcast louder.

We've optimized for volume when what we needed was understanding.

We've chosen efficiency over effectiveness.

We've forgotten that communication is supposed to be a conversation, not a monologue.

What Happens When You Flip the Script

Imagine receiving a job application that begins with a story about why the candidate has always aspired to work in your industry. Ninety seconds of genuine connection instead of another list of qualifications you can find on LinkedIn.

Imagine a TEDx proposal that shows, not tells, why their idea matters through a personal story that connects to your event's theme.

Imagine sales outreach that demonstrates they actually understand your business challenges, rather than just pitching their solution.

That's what happens when you stop exhaling and start listening.

Your Challenge

The next time you need to communicate something important - a job application, a speaker proposal, a sales message, even just reaching out to someone new - try this:

Use Andy Blum's five questions. Force yourself to think about their experience first.

Then tell a story instead of making a pitch.

See what happens when you actually communicate instead of just broadcasting.

Because the companies that figure this out first, the candidates who understand this shift, the people who remember that communication goes both ways - they're going to win.

Not because they're smarter. Because they're actually listening.

What assumption about modern communication needs to die? Hit reply and tell me what you're seeing in your world - I read every response.

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