BPD is who I am, and an inherent part of my daily existence, so naturally I forgot to mention it on the podcast! Last week I had a pretty uncomfortable BPD episode which brought this whole topic back into the spotlight. In this episode I share what happened with you, how I experience Borderline Personality Disorder, and most importantly: why I am so GRATEFUL to have BPD, since it truly comes with its own set of incredible superpowers.

Episode breakdown:

• After sharing how I was unofficially diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, I read the official diagnostic criteria and share how I experienced some imposter syndrome due to knowing that other people experience more intense suffering than I do.
• As a person with BPD, I experience intense, unstable emotions: high highs, and low lows. People have described me as “dramatic” and living life on a rollercoaster. It can be incredibly difficult navigating life with these symptoms.
• The emotional suffering I experienced in my early 20s caused me to seek and find help. The tools of the 12 Step recovery program I joined supported me to better manage my sensitive, intense & unstable emotional nature.
• Fear of abandonment (real or imagined) is a major trigger for people with BPD, including myself. I share what happens when I get triggered, and why I’m not able to think or respond rationally to a situation whilst I am experiencing a BPD episode.
• I describe in detail the BPD episode I experienced last week, the rollercoaster ride it put me on, the abusive way I treated my partner, all the while believing I was acting sanely!
• I usually operate with a high degree of self awareness. When I suddenly react very irrationally to a situation, it can be very confusing for the people around me. I share how my loved ones can best support me when I am in intense emotional distress.
• Today I relate far more to the positive aspects of BPD than the negatives ones! Some of the superpowers BPD has granted me are: a heightened ability to be authentic, vulnerable and open. An acute awareness of my emotions at any given time. Intense passion, joy, and happiness. An ability to sense people’s true emotions, even those they may not be aware of. I am highly empathetic and can experience deep intimacy with other people. An ability to see the true beauty in the world.
• I have done much work to improve my mental health, and I highly recommend 12 Step recovery programs to anyone who is suffering from BPD. I am truly grateful to have this mental illness because it caused me to walk my own unique path and has blessed me with a life full of beauty and depth.

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If you resonate with this episode, want to know more about my story, the 12 Step recovery program I’m in, or have any other comments or questions, I’d love to hear from you! Please send me an email at [email protected]

Lots of love, 

Josephine

References:

• National Institute of Health - Borderline Personality Disorder
• Psych Central - The Gift of Borderline Personality Disorder
• Imi Lo, Eggshell Therapy - Advantages of Borderline Personality Disorder – 7 BPD gifts that may surprise you

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