After leaving the Dayridge House during winter break of my ninth-grade year, I found myself starting over once again. Steve picked me up in a U-Haul, and before heading to my new home, we stopped at a storage unit filled with my mom’s things.

Not long after arriving at Monica and Steve’s, I experienced my first panic attack and was diagnosed with anxiety. I’ll never forget the emotions that came when I visited my grandparents’ empty house, a place filled with so many memories, and then learning I would never be allowed to step inside it again.

The relief I felt leaving the Dayridge House didn’t last. Things went downhill quickly and stayed there for my entire time with Monica and Steve. What happened in that home became my most painful experience while in foster care, and it came at the hands of people who had known me my entire life. In this episode, I begin sharing what happened inside those walls.

Names and places have been changed for privacy. The memories are real, and they are some of the hardest I have shared.