The third Hobbit Movie! The Battle of the Five Armies (2014) is a film in existence! Ridiculous, impossible, moronic things happen in the film. In the film, there are also characters, which we discuss and don't really care about. The EAGLES show up and save the dasy! Again! We discuss that.

Also, we have learned (and discuss) that you can pound on thinly frozen ice with a 2-ton metal hammer and not break it! And you can jump through ice into the air by standing on the water beneath the it! We discuss that, too! Absurd plot devices and conveniently randomly-appearing animals abound, which we also discuss.

How did this movie make a $1 billion?!?! Not surprisingly, we discuss that as well, along with the ethics of honor and valuing stuff over people.

This episode also contains a brief apologist's defense of the movie (thanks, Mark!).

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