Ahead of Remembrance Day, we are re-releasing one of the most poignant interviews ever recorded on The InDependent Spouse podcast. Host Jess Sands talks with the brilliant and inspirational founder, Nikki Scott, about the incredible journey that led her to create Scotty's Little Soldiers.

Nikki shares the intensely personal and heartbreaking story of losing her husband, Lee Scott, who was killed in Afghanistan. She discusses the immediate aftermath, including the difficult decision of leaving the married quarter and the emotional weight of his repatriation.

This conversation is a powerful exploration of grief, resilience, and the power of community, highlighting how Nikki transformed her pain into a mission to ensure bereaved British forces children can "smile again". We dive into the vital work of Scotty's Little Soldiers and how they support military children who have lost a parent, regardless of how they died.

Key Takeaways & Discussion Points

The Birth of Scotty's Little Soldiers: The idea was born on a family holiday nine months after Lee's death, when Nikki saw her 5-year-old son, Kai, smile and laugh again. This was her 'wake-up call' and the moment she realized she needed to help other children who had experienced the death of a parent who served.

The Mission: Helping Them Smile: Scotty's Little Soldiers is dedicated to supporting all bereaved British forces children from the Armed Forces community.

Support: An online bereavement service and resources to help families before they reach crisis points.

Lee's Legacy: Nikki remembers Lee, who was killed at age 26, as the fun parent and "everybody's friend" . She believes he would be "100% behind" the charity.

Scotty's Little Soldiers Website: Find information, donate, fundraise, or get support - https://www.scottyslittlesoldiers.co.uk/

"Scotty's is something that we don't ever want to have to use, but to know that our children have that if they need it means so much."

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Welcome to the final episode of Series 7! This week, I'm joined by Bekky, a Navy wife, mum of three, and a graduate from the Milspo Business Start-Up course.

Bekky shares her incredible journey from feeling lost and lonely as a new military partner to building her own thriving business, The Crafty Starfish.

We discuss the unique challenges military spouses face, such as frequent moves, deployments, and the general chaos of service life, and how she overcame them to create a business that is uniquely her own.Join us to hear Bekky share her inspiring story of overcoming the loneliness many new military partners experience to build her amazing business, The Crafty Starfish.

Discover how she navigated these obstacles to create something truly special!

Episode Highlights:

• The Struggle for Belonging: Bekky opens up about the isolation she felt as a military partner and her search for a community that understood her experiences beyond just the military.

• The Genesis of an Idea: Discover how a personal love for sewing and a desire for a flexible career led Bekky to start her business, making beautiful, high-quality, and unique clothes for children.

• Overcoming the Odds: Hear how Bekky navigated the complexities of launching a business while pregnant, during a global pandemic, and with her husband deployed. She shares how the Milspo business course provided the crucial support she needed to succeed.

• Progress Over Perfection: Bekky reveals how she shifted her mindset from striving for perfection to embracing progress, a key lesson that helped her get her business off the ground.

• Finding Your 'Why': Learn about the deeply personal reasons behind Bekky's entrepreneurial journey—creating something for herself, setting an example for her children, and proving that it's possible to build a career you love while navigating military life.

Connect with Bekky's Business, The Crafty Starfish: https://craftystarfish.co.uk/

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Welcome back to The InDependent Spouse Podcast! In this episode, your host Jess Sands dives into the inspirational world of Major Jo Vann – a true multi-hyphenate who redefines what it means to juggle military life, motherhood, and a thriving business.

Jo is not only working full-time in the British Army with a serving husband and two children, but she also runs a stunning boutique hotel in Amesbury called "A Little Place." Jess was lucky enough to visit this beautiful Georgian property, which she describes as something out of a Jane Austen novel.

In this conversation, Jo shares how her military training, sporting background (including playing netball for England!), and a passion for people has equipped her to build an amazing business and team.

Key Takeaways from Jo:

• Build an Amazing Team: Jo emphasizes that her number one priority when starting her business was growing an incredible team, allowing her to minimise her day-to-day contribution because of the people running it.

• Lessons from Military and Sport: The teamwork aspect, learned through both her army career and sport, has been crucial. She highlights how collaborating with others brings in broader skills and makes you stronger.

• The Drive to Give Back: After her successful sporting career, Jo developed a passion for coaching, becoming the head coach of the UK Armed Forces netball team, driven by a desire to give back.

• The Motivation Behind "A Little Place": Her love for people and bringing them together, combined with a desire for stability during a challenging period of army life with children, led her to open the hotel. She also aims to offer a safe and comfortable escape for the military community near Salisbury Plain.

• The Power of the Reserves: Jo sheds light on how Armed Forces Reserves offer flexible commitment levels, complementary income, personal development, teamwork, and unique training opportunities for those balancing civilian careers or businesses.

• Embracing Bravery and Curiosity: Jo encourages listeners to test new ideas and not be afraid to try "brave things," even if they feel like too much on their plate. She reminds us that regret often comes from not taking opportunities.

This episode is a must-listen if you're feeling overwhelmed but need a powerful dose of inspiration to show you what's possible when you embrace challenges and build an incredible support system.

Connect with Jo Vann and A Little Place:

• Website: a little place

• Instagram (A Little Place): https://www.instagram.com/alittleplace_uk/

• LinkedIn (Jo Vann): You can find Jo on LinkedIn to learn more about her and the reserves - https://www.linkedin.com/in/joanna-vann/

Connect with The InDependent Spouse Podcast:

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/milsponetwork/

• Find a Milspo Directory: Showcase your military spouse-owned business! https://findamilspo.co.uk/

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Welcome back to The InDependent Spouse podcast! In this particularly exciting episode, Jess Sands sits down with the brilliant Felicity Mercer, wife to Johnny Mercer, who has navigated the unique challenges of armed forces life, the intense world of politics, and is now an award-winning business owner.

We cover it all, from meeting Johnny Mercer (MP and former Minister for State for Veterans Affairs) as children, reconnecting as adults when he was serving in Afghanistan, to supporting him through a whirlwind political career. Felicity shares candid insights into the realities of being a political wife – far from glamorous – including dealing with public scrutiny, death threats, and the toll it takes on family life.

She discusses the unexpected pivot from supporting her husband's public service to launching her own successful business, The Dress Barn, just six months ago. Discover how she's found pure joy in her new venture, applying years of experience to create a welcoming space for her clients, and even inspiring her own daughters to get involved.

Felicity offers powerful advice for anyone in the military community looking to transition and start something new: "Don't overthink it. Just go for it!"

This episode is a testament to resilience, adaptability, and finding your own path amidst the extraordinary demands of military and political life.

Key Takeaways:

• The Unseen Side of Public Life: Felicity offers a raw and honest look at the lack of glamour and the intense public hatred and threats that can come with being a political spouse.

• Turning Challenges into Opportunities: Despite the difficulties of military and political life, Felicity emphasizes the importance of laughter and finding humor in tough situations.

• Empowerment Through Entrepreneurship: Learn how Felicity channelled her experiences and a small investment into a thriving and joyful business that empowers other women.

• The Power of "Don't Overthink It": Felicity's core advice for military spouses considering a new venture is to overcome self-doubt, have a plan, and back yourself.

• Inspiring the Next Generation: Felicity shares how her business journey is influencing her daughters, teaching them about hard work, independence, and the joy of helping others.

The Dress Barn: Felicity Mercer's award-winning business, located near the Devon/Cornwall border - https://dress-barn.co.uk/

Join the Course!

Are you a military spouse looking to start your own business? Join The InDependent Spouse's

Business Launch Accelerator course! This fully funded, 8-week online course covers everything you need to know about entrepreneurship as a military spouse or partner. It's available for any partner or spouse of serving regular or reservist armed forces personnel and is funded by the Armed Forces Covenant Fund Trust and the Ministry of Defence.

Learn more and sign up at milspo.co.uk/course. The course starts in September, and applications are open NOW!

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Join Jess Sands in this inspiring episode of The InDependent Spouse as she welcomes the incredible duo behind the award-winning podcast, Pad Wives Assemble – Sophs and Kirsha!

Tune in as they dive into the realities of modern military life, discussing everything from building a supportive tri-service community to challenging outdated stereotypes about military spouses. Sophs and Kirsha share their journey of creating Pad Wives Assemble, born from a desire to provide a fun, safe, and inclusive space for armed forces families to connect and feel heard, with a few giggles along the way.

They open up about overcoming negative feedback, the power of positive messages from their listeners, and the daily ups and downs of military life. Discover the story behind their surprising UK Top Influencer Award win and why visibility for military families is so crucial in today's world.

Plus, get ready to be inspired by their incredible charitable initiatives! Sophs and Kirsha reveal their ongoing efforts to support veterans' mental health through Combat Stress and tease their exciting "Rationed and Ready: The Pad Wife Trials" YouTube series – a three-day immersive military-style challenge created by veterans, all for a great cause.

This episode is a testament to the resilience, strength, and incredible community spirit of military spouses. Whether you're navigating deployments, solo parenting, or simply looking for relatable stories and a good laugh, Sophs and Kirsha remind us that we are all in this together.

Key Takeaways:

• Building Community: The importance of creating inclusive spaces for all military spouses, regardless of service or rank, to share experiences and find support.

• Challenging Stereotypes: How open and honest conversations can break down misconceptions about military spouses and partners.

• The Power of Connection: The profound impact of shared stories and a friendly voice in combating loneliness and isolation in military life.

• Resilience in Action: Inspiring examples of military spouses turning personal challenges into thriving platforms and charitable endeavors.

• Giving Back: The dedication of Pad Wives Assemble to supporting veterans' mental health and other community initiatives.

About Pad Wives Assemble:

Pad Wives Assemble is an award-winning podcast created by Sophs and co-hosted by Kirsha, focusing on the realities of military life with a fun, honest, and inclusive approach for tri-service families. They are passionate about building community, challenging stigmas, and supporting charitable causes related to the armed forces.

Connect with Pad Wives Assemble: www.padwivesemble.co.uk

Events Mentioned:

• "Rationed and Ready: The Pad Wife Trials" - A six-part YouTube series coming soon, documenting a three-day military-style challenge for charity..

• Pad Wives Assemble Gala - An event featuring live performers, casino tables, raffles, and veterans sharing their stories, with voting proceeds going to Combat Stress. Tickets available on their website.

• Battle of the Forces - A boxing charity night in collaboration with veterans, aiming to become its own charity entity.

• Nuts Challenge Run - Fundraising for a veteran to open a jacket potato van that will employ other veterans.

About The InDependent Spouse Podcast:

Hosted by Jess Sands, The InDependent Spouse is your go-to podcast for inspiration and support in modern military life. Jess shares real stories of resilience and success from military partners, aiming to create a sense of belonging and remind listeners they are not alone.

Connect with The InDependent Spouse: www.milspo.co.uk/podcast

Free Business Startup Course: Available at www.milspo.co.uk/course

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Welcome to another inspiring episode of The InDependent Spouse Podcast! In this episode, your host Jess Sands sits down with the phenomenal Ria Jackson, an RAF veteran, founder of "The V Word," and CEO of Inclusive Minds UK. Join us as Ria shares her extraordinary journey of self-discovery and resilience, and learn about her mission to champion neuro-inclusion.

Episode Highlights:

• A "Squiggly Career" in the RAF: Ria shares her 12-year journey in the military, starting as a mover and ultimately pivoting to become an avionic engineer on Typhoons. She discusses how her diverse experiences in the forces, including extensive travel, provided invaluable lessons and shaped her squiggly path.

• The Transition and Unexpected Challenges: Discover the personal reasons behind Ria's decision to leave the RAF at the 12-year mark, including finding her life partner and facing medical downgrades due to knee injuries. She bravely opens up about the struggles of finding a job while pregnant and how this led her unexpectedly into education.

• Unveiling Neurodivergence: Ria transparently shares her journey through mental health difficulties post-military and motherhood, which ultimately led to her diagnosis of ADHD and dyspraxia. This pivotal moment transformed her self-awareness into profound self-acceptance.

• The Birth of The V Word and Inclusive Minds UK: Learn how Ria's personal need for community and an outlet for expression led to the accidental creation of "The V Word," an online community for women veterans. She recounts the viral success of her blog post "The Odd One Out," which gained 1.5 million views, and how this platform, though initially an escapism, became her "saviour" and laid the groundwork for Inclusive Minds UK.

• The Power of Neuro-Inclusion: Ria passionately explains why neuro-inclusion matters to everyone, emphasizing the human need to belong and create spaces where everyone can bring their whole selves. She discusses the importance of meeting others with curiosity and kindness, fostering growth and understanding rather than conflict.

• The IM Hub: An Accessible Resource: Get an exclusive insight into Ria's new venture, "The IM Hub," a purpose-built platform designed to make learning about neuro-inclusion affordable and accessible for all – from parents and partners to managers and individuals who are "neuro-curious." She highlights the hub's unique shared model of influence, offering insights from professionals with lived, medical, and academic experience.

• Language, Identity, and Growth: Ria shares powerful anecdotes about the evolving landscape of language around neurodiversity and the importance of owning mistakes and continuously learning. She emphasizes that identity is personal and that true support comes from understanding the individual, not just their diagnosis.

About Ria Jackson:

Ria Jackson is an RAF veteran, the visionary founder of 'The V Word' (a women veterans online community), and the CEO of Inclusive Minds UK. Her work with Inclusive Minds UK is dedicated to normalising neuro-inclusion, creating safe and supportive environments where everyone can thrive.

Connect with Ria & Inclusive Minds UK: www.inclusivemindsuk.com

About The InDependent Spouse Podcast:

The InDependent Spouse podcast, hosted by Jess Sands, is your essential guide to navigating modern military life. It's a place for inspiration and support, sharing real stories of resilience and success from the armed forces family to remind you that you're not alone. What started as a passion project in 2018 has grown into a thriving business network, helping military spouses build their own businesses and find success that thrives in military life.

Connect with The InDependent Spouse: www.milspo.co.uk/podcast

Explore free tools, resources, and upcoming courses like the business startup course in September!

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In this inspiring episode, host Jess Sands welcomes Lulu from the Marama Alliance, a vibrant community dedicated to supporting Fijian women and their families in the UK armed forces.

Lulu shares her personal journey of moving from Fiji to the UK as a military spouse, facing challenges like adapting to a new climate and navigating unfamiliar systems like working in the UK, opening bank accounts, and that pesky married quarter heating.

This episode highlights the incredible resilience and unity of the Fijian military community and the vital role Marama Alliance plays in helping these families thrive while preserving their rich cultural heritage.

Key Takeaways:

• The Power of Community: Discover how the Fijian community in the UK armed forces provides essential support, from helping new arrivals with practical needs like setting up a home to celebrating cultural events and offering emotional connection.

• Cultural Preservation & Integration: Learn about Marama Alliance's efforts to keep Fijian culture alive through initiatives like Fijian Language Week and community gatherings, while also encouraging integration into the wider UK society.

• Navigating the Unknown: Lulu candidly discusses the unique challenges faced by Commonwealth military spouses, particularly concerning immigration status, housing, and resettlement when leaving the military, emphasizing the importance of early preparation.

• The Importance of Expanding Your Network: Lulu encourages military spouses to connect beyond their immediate military or cultural communities to expand their networks, find job opportunities, and gain diverse perspectives.

• Advice for New Spouses: Lulu shares invaluable advice for new military spouses moving to a new country: keep an open mind, be flexible, and don't hesitate to ask questions – there are no silly questions.

About the Guest:

Lulu is a driving force behind the Marama Alliance, a non-profit community organization dedicated to supporting Fijian women and their families in the UK. The alliance provides crucial information, creates community, and helps members navigate the complexities of military life and integration in a new country. They are working towards establishing themselves as a charity to further expand their vital programs and initiatives.

Connect with Marama Alliance: https://www.maramaalliance.com/

About The InDependent Spouse Podcast:

The InDependent Spouse podcast, hosted by Jess Sands, is your essential guide to navigating modern military life. Jess shares inspirational stories of resilience and success from military partners, offering support and community for those juggling family, business, and finding their place in the military world.

Connect with The InDependent Spouse: https://milspo.co.uk/podcast

Don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe to The InDependent Spouse Podcast for more inspiring stories and support!

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Welcome to The InDependent Spouse podcast, your go-to place for inspiration and support in navigating modern military life. In this episode, host Jess Sands sits down with the incredible Camilla Howard: an RAF veteran, an Army spouse, a forces child, and a dedicated advocate for the military spouse community.

After 12 years in the RAF, Camilla transitioned to a civilian career with Compass Group UK and Ireland. She details how her passion for supporting military families led her to co-chair Compass Group's Armed Forces network, a role that allows her to champion initiatives for spouses and veterans.

Listen along to discover:

• Camilla's personal anecdotes about the "interesting balance" of dual-serving military careers and raising a child amidst frequent moves.

• How Compass Group actively supports military spouses through their innovative yet simple spouses policy, including endeavoring to redeploy spouses on posting, celebrating an annual Spouses Day during Armed Forces Week, and offering an extra day of leave for deployment collection or drop-off.

• The importance of the Armed Forces network's advocacy roundtables, which bring together companies to share best practices and encourage more organizations to genuinely support the military community.

• Camilla's invaluable advice for military spouses navigating career transitions: "release the pressure valve on yourself", understand your "red line areas", and leverage your network.

• Why military spouses possess unique and highly beneficial skill sets that are an asset to any company.

Camilla emphasizes that the military community is not about "pity parties", but about highlighting the incredible talent and resilience within it.

If you're a corporate interested in starting your own Armed Forces network or learning more about Compass Group's initiatives, you can reach out via [email protected]

Discover More from The InDependent Spouse Podcast: https://milspo.co.uk/podcast/

Inspired by Camilla's journey and feeling that spark to build something for yourself? We get it. At Milspo, we're more than just a community; we're a supportive hub where military spouses, partners, and other-halves transform challenges into incredible business opportunities. You're not alone in navigating postings, deployments, or the unique rhythm of military life – we're right there with you.

If you're ready to move from feeling overwhelmed to empowered, and from isolated to connected, our website is your next step. It's the go-to place for inspiration, practical strategies, and genuine connections with others who truly understand. Stop feeling lost and start building a sustainable business that thrives, not just survives your modern military life. www.milspo.co.uk

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Join Jess Sands in this inspiring episode of The InDependent Spouse Podcast as she chats with the incredible Alex Rickerby. Alex, a career coach for the Forces Employment Charity and a private coach in the tech sector, shares her remarkable story of balancing a high-powered career with the unique demands of military life, motherhood, and unexpected challenges.

In this episode, you'll hear about:

• A Powerhouse Career Before Military Life: Discover Alex's impressive professional background, including her years at The Telegraph and her impactful role as a Senior Industry Head at Google, managing key client relationships with central government, publishing, and top non-profit charities.

• The Unexpected Turn: Alex candidly discusses the "easiest, hardest decision" she made to step away from her corporate career at Google after the challenging birth and illness of her first child, highlighting the profound impact it had on her life and choices.

• Building a Business on the Move: Learn how Alex strategically utilised "20% time" at Google to explore coaching and how her own transformative experience with a coach in her twenties inspired her path. She also shares how living overseas, particularly in Canada, provided the unique opportunity and "brain space" to invest in her coaching qualification and lay the foundations for her business.

• The Unexpected Realities of Overseas Life: Alex opens up about the immense community support received during her husband's sudden and serious illness while they were posted in Canada, and the invaluable safety net the armed forces community provides when life takes unforeseen turns.

• The Unflappable Spirit of Military Spouses: Alex passionately highlights the incredible value, capacity, and "unflappability" that military spouses possess, skills often created through navigating frequent moves, deployments, and the general unpredictability of armed forces life. She emphasizes the importance of using available resources and networks within the military spouse community

• Essential Support for Military Families: Alex details her work as a career coach for the Forces Employment Charity, providing lifelong support for veterans, families, and serving personnel. She also discusses her volunteer coaching role with Recruit for Spouses, underscoring the abundance of free and high-quality support available to military spouses for career development and personal growth.

Key Takeaways:

• Military life, while presenting unique challenges, also builds incredible skills, adaptability, and a strong sense of community

• Use the resources available to military spouses, such as career coaching and business support programs offered by charities like the Forces Employment Charity and Recruit for Spouses.

Connect with Alex: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alexrickerby/

Discover More from The InDependent Spouse Podcast: https://milspo.co.uk/podcast/

If you're a military spouse with a business idea, or looking to start your own, join the MILSPO eight-week online business startup course! Thanks to the Armed Forces Covenant Fund Trust, your space is funded. Over 60 military spouses and partners have already been helped to start their businesses!

Head to https://milspo.co.uk/course/ to register for updates and save your seat.

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This week on The InDependent Spouse, host Jess Sands welcomes the inspiring Dr. Kathrine McAleese for a deeply insightful conversation about navigating the demands of modern military life while striving for personal and professional fulfillment. This episode is a must-listen for any military spouse seeking to find success on their own terms and reclaim their joy amidst the beautiful chaos of armed forces life.

Dr. Kathrine McAleese, a psychotherapist and sociologist by background, specializes in helping high-achievers find a "deliciously satisfying life" that prioritises what's actually important, not just what's expected. She shares her unique perspective on finding your purpose, building resilience, and escaping the societal pressure to "have it all" – especially important for military spouses who often have to juggle all of the things.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• The unique challenges of military spouse life: Jess and Kathrine discuss the feeling of being "lost and lonely" when first becoming a military partner and the constant search for belonging and connection within the community. They touch on the "1950s housewife" stereotype and the uncertainty that military life can bring, often leading spouses to feel they have to fit a particular role.

• Redefining Success: Learn why the conventional idea of "having it all" can be counterproductive and how to identify what "enough" truly means for you. Kathrine challenges the insatiable drive of modern society and offers a refreshing perspective on finding satisfaction.

• Practical Strategies for Overwhelm: Feeling lost in the wilderness of chaos? Dr. Kathrine shares actionable steps to manage overwhelm, including the power of writing things down and embracing the "minimum viable action" – making progress through tiny, seemingly insignificant steps.

• Finding Your Independent Identity: The conversation delves into the importance of having something that is "yours" – a business, a hobby, or a passion project – that is independent of military life. This is crucial for maintaining a sense of place and recognising your own skills and contributions.

• The Power of Showing Up: Both Jess and Kathrine emphasise that military spouses "were not put here to make up the numbers" and deserve to show the world how epic they are. They explore the concept of "unapologetically living your best life" and how owning your unique light can inspire others in the military community.

• Supporting the Whole System: Kathrine shares her powerful insight from past research: when military families are taken care of and thriving, it positively impacts serving personnel and can even contribute to better outcomes and retention.

Connect with Dr. Kathrine McAleese:

• Website: https://www.drkathrine.com/

• Instagram: @drkathrine

• Her Book: Enough. https://www.drkathrine.com/enough

Don't forget to share this episode with a fellow military spouse who could use a dose of inspiration, leave us a review, and subscribe so you don't miss next week's episode!

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