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The Language of Agreements
The Language of Agreements
Do you have agreements often?
Can you remember the last time you had a conflict of opinions with someone at home or work?
As you remember that specific time, how detailed was your conversation?
What kind of emotions was present?
In every conversation, there is always a concept of Context.
In what context are we have having the discussion, or what context is the conflict related to.
In the heat of the moment, we don’t realise that we are going into too many details.
We don't realise that we are imposing our model of the world on others.
Not everyone thinks as we do. So, in this situation, what is the best outcome we can have.
The Language of Agreements, as I call it, comes from the Linguistic concept of Hierarchy of Ideas.
It's a known fact that when as human beings, our core values are similar. E.g. We all yearn for Love, Security, Respect and Trust.
When we reflect on these values in our conversations, we generally tend to relax and focus on the bigger picture. We are aligned to the higher purpose.
We begin to understand the other person's model of the world. The discussions become ecological and there is win-win for everyone involved.
We also realise that the negative emotions go away.
So what can we do:
- Practice gratitude. Be thankful for the people in your lives.
- Practice understanding your values
- Understand that everyone is doing their best behaviour in the current conditions
- Practice being in the present moment and being aware of your emotions.
- If the emotions are negative in a conversation, practice abstracting to the level of your values.
We all can have a great conversation. The quality depends on the level of abstraction and win-win for everyone involved.
*************************************
Share this message with your friends
https://chat.whatsapp.com/GioeEB7Osfz0VbeDO9cTba
*************************************
Chander Shankar
NLP Coach and Mentor
Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd
http://www.enkindleandempower.com/
New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
****************************************
View all episodes
By Chander ShankarThe Language of Agreements
Do you have agreements often?
Can you remember the last time you had a conflict of opinions with someone at home or work?
As you remember that specific time, how detailed was your conversation?
What kind of emotions was present?
In every conversation, there is always a concept of Context.
In what context are we have having the discussion, or what context is the conflict related to.
In the heat of the moment, we don’t realise that we are going into too many details.
We don't realise that we are imposing our model of the world on others.
Not everyone thinks as we do. So, in this situation, what is the best outcome we can have.
The Language of Agreements, as I call it, comes from the Linguistic concept of Hierarchy of Ideas.
It's a known fact that when as human beings, our core values are similar. E.g. We all yearn for Love, Security, Respect and Trust.
When we reflect on these values in our conversations, we generally tend to relax and focus on the bigger picture. We are aligned to the higher purpose.
We begin to understand the other person's model of the world. The discussions become ecological and there is win-win for everyone involved.
We also realise that the negative emotions go away.
So what can we do:
- Practice gratitude. Be thankful for the people in your lives.
- Practice understanding your values
- Understand that everyone is doing their best behaviour in the current conditions
- Practice being in the present moment and being aware of your emotions.
- If the emotions are negative in a conversation, practice abstracting to the level of your values.
We all can have a great conversation. The quality depends on the level of abstraction and win-win for everyone involved.
*************************************
Share this message with your friends
https://chat.whatsapp.com/GioeEB7Osfz0VbeDO9cTba
*************************************
Chander Shankar
NLP Coach and Mentor
Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd
http://www.enkindleandempower.com/
New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
****************************************