Abhik brings in an infamous game from 1987 - at the end of a frustrating tour, a seemingly innocuous incident leads to an unseemly escalation between player and umpire. Mike Gatting vs Shakoor Rana - it made for an iconic photograph but who was in the right? And should you still respect the law if the law is an ass? We cover defamation law, ancient Babylonian ethics and the meta-question of "who umpires the umpires" before recounting some personal episodes of poor officiating, including unconventional childhood bowling actions and an umpire who mistook off stump for leg.

Today's game - England vs Pakistan, Faisalabad, Dec 7-12 1987